#33: Let's all chant "I think it can! I think it can! I think it can!"

[justclay12]

If I am being ignored, nobody tell me, okay?

I'm sorry. Did you say something?

canfly172, you crack me up. Of course, most of you make me laugh which is why I like it here. Plus, I like that you can say what you want here, even when you get disagreed with.

And sheiladownunder, I didn't get the impression anyone was saying that jaymes was considered better than Clay, just that it could also be argued that way as well as what clayzor said, however she said it, which by now I've completely forgotten because my brain is full of holes.

I also hope Clay will be at the ceremony tomorrow night for the broadway thing, just so I can get more pretty pictures, and also know that he is safely here and not in some high risk country.

[FromClaygary]

Any Canadians know if they'll ship to Canada and if so, if the S&H is the same?

Sure hope so! I ordered a bunch, and I have heard nothing to indicate it was a problem. Mind you ...I've heard nothing!

"Ordered a bunch" as in "ordered exactly as many as you needed" or "ordered a bunch" as in you will have extras?

Will we see you at GDG's in a couple of weekends?

Sorry! I emailed the list and thought I had caught everyone...no, ordered exactly as many as we needed...but if anyone doesn't want theirs...it's yours! Hoping to be there at GDGs....if I can walk.

Bitches United for Sperminator.

Incorporated.

DEFINITELY count me in for that pin!!

[canfly172]

Bitches United for Sperminator.

Incorporated.

:lmaosmiley-1:

[justclay12]

Hey, how many posts does it take to stop being a body guard, because I'd actually like this position. Of course I would be totally useless if Clay's was the body I was guarding, because why would I want to look at anyone else?

[PermaSwooned]

Well, to borrow from the reporter's notebook, sometimes it isn't even so much "what" or "how" something is said as "when".

Quite a few people are feeling a little sensitive at the moment. Even though many posters might gently (or not so gently) joke or complain about Clay here at "home" on a regular basis, they might not be feeling as comfortable doing that at this particular point in time. He's being ridiculed and pilloried all over the media and the internet, including by some at his own fan club site. That's upsetting quite a few people more than any quasi-news, I think, and may have some in a bit more protective mode than normal.

Heidi Ho I loved your post. I am a fan of Clay Aiken because I love his voice, I love his heart, I think he's a fascinating person (from what I know) and he's more entertaining in concert than any other solo artist I've ever seen. I cannot understand why I am supposed to care about the intimate details of his personal life. I don't really want to know the nitty gritty about ANY celebrities life, nor that of any of my co-workers or acquaintances for that matter. WAY too much TMI. I cannot understand why I am supposed to care or take a stand, for God's sake, on what Clay Aiken does in the boudoir or who he's doing it with. WHY does this seem to be so important to so many people in his case more than almost anyone else I can think of? I'm never going to get that.

I worked for years as a flight attendant (yes I did, so you can stop that snickering) and many more years in the medical field. The number of gay persons in those fields is much higher than average. It was just one more aspect of who they were...nothing that caused any kind of big reaction from co-workers than whether they had blond or brown hair. Maybe that's why I have such a hard time understanding this obsession to "know" by every Tom, Dick (double-meaning intended) and Perez out there.

I like reading and posting here because I HAVE met so many of the posters. I can "see" them talking to me when they post, and I enjoy that. It probably does give me a framework for their remarks, and maybe that affects the way I read what they are saying. It's hard to know.

I can probably say just about anything here and get away with it, since I rarely get any reaction at all to my posts, unless I include a picture. So.....

I turned the page on my calendar today and will get to see this face for the next month. I look at that face and I see someone who loves performing. He's said that many times. I don't see that changing unless it seems to him that he will not be allowed to have ANY personal life....that he has to perform for "us" non-stop or ELSE. I have no idea what his next concert will be like, but I feel fairly confident that there WILL be one.

Wherever it is, whenever it is, I'm planning to be there.

[Couch Tomato]

Ahhh Perma..the FIRST person I ever met in this fandom. The first person to let me know I wasn't just talking into a sea of nothingness.

[laljeterfan]

As a non-regular poster who doesn't often initiate topics or conversations, I find that I will most often respond to something that affects me emotionally- hopefully, usually- something that resonates with me on a personal level, but also at times something that pushes my buttons. And sometimes I'll respond to something just because I find it amusing. For example:

But it really galls me when the poster that I agree with is someone who annoys the hell out of me normally.

If I am being ignored, nobody tell me, okay?

I'm sorry. Did you say something?

Permaswooned- Guess I'm proving your point- but thank you for the loverly picture!

(trying desperately to think of any excuse to continue to put off grocery shopping- cept I'm out of Diet Pepsi and could really use a jolt!)

[Thankful4Clay]

Bitches United for Sperminator.

Incorporated.

:lmaosmiley-1:

I'll hop on that BUS.

ETA: I work full time with no Internet access at work. I am always catching up after the fact and commenting just doesn't make sense. My weekends can be busy, too, so I mostly lurk and jump in once in a while.

I enjoy reading here and have met many of the posters. It is nice to be able to put a face to a screen name.

[Scarlett]

Clay is more than good enough for anyone ever born.

Hey wait a sec... speak for yourself!

Now people may assume that I think Clay's perfect because I haven't posted anything particularly hateful but you see I'm really v. picky about the people I hate. While I'm generally open to the idea of loving any person on earth I have to admit that I'm a bigot when I comes to hating. I can only feel hatred towards people who are in the same class and standing as I am. Everyone else gets a few words here and there and hardly more than a brief passing thought. So going back to Clay, he might just barely make it into my league for hating. However, since my hate issue list is extremely short: unkindness, dishonesty and intolerance, er, I guess that's about it. Anything beyond these, I'm easy. Yes, even with people who make me sleep on the wet spot. So, there just hasn't been a lot of opportunity for Clay to go over the line on my hot items. When he does, though, I will definitely hate on him.

Oh, and I wasn't born. I came out of the sea foam on shore of a Greek island. What.

[Couch Tomato]

JustClay..your post amused me too...about being galled to agree with someone you don't normally.

I think part of the "pain" of 2006 for me is that I was suddenly in agreement with a group of people I had disagreed with about everything for the past 2 years. HEH. It was indeed a strange phenomenon. heee. I would PM Ansa and say GOD..I have to agree with so and so!

[ldyjocelyn]

Replying to this while streaming OMWH the song on AOL...*hint hint*

I like reading and posting here because I HAVE met so many of the posters. I can "see" them talking to me when they post, and I enjoy that. It probably does give me a framework for their remarks, and maybe that affects the way I read what they are saying. It's hard to know.

Well, gosh [tm King Arthur], I agree with this. I think being able to visualize a poster while reading their stuff can make a different -- possibly. I also think that happens because of those of us who came from different boards -- I've yet to meet many of the people who posted regularly at CV, for example, because 3 years ago I was attending CH parties, and there wasn't much intermingling with other board parties. Around here, we're having virtual "intermingling." (That sounds kind of dirty, doesn't it...)

Yet, there are people I've "known" from message boards for years that I've never met *waves at my good buddy Ansa*, so that's not always the case.

I think one of the reasons I like going to Clay concerts, besides, you know, CLAAAAAAY, is getting to associate a name with a face at pre/post parties. In a way, it was great for the last two tours, because those of us who got to know each other through the FCA board, rather than our original home boards, were finally meeting up. It was a bit like "FCA has arrived."

To the lurkers and the new people posting -- thank you. I look forward to getting to know you, simply by having you post once in a while. Heck, you really don't even need to post -- the PM button is very helpful in getting to know people.

It does blow my mind when I agree with someone I normally don't -- which tells me how diverse each and every one of us is!

[KAndre]

KAndre eyes Scarlett....

Uh huh. Sea foam people get to have David A, just so you know.

You people are so sweet - I personally decide that the people I normally disagree with have finally seen the light and soon will be obeying my every command!

[Clayzorback]

:F_05BL17blowkiss: Let it go sheila. I have............

[aikim]

Just because a post is not acknowledged on the board, doesn't mean it isn't read and appreciated.

I read every post...I enjoy reading intelligent posts that make me think and sometimes re-evaluate my POV...sometimes I respond, sometimes I don't. There are times when I want to respond and can't seem to put what is in my head into words so I usually just nod in agreement silently and move on.

Sometimes there are posts that just plain piss me off and it is far better if I don't respond, take a few minutes and then continue reading.

I've noticed a lot of times that posts you think people will respond to they don't and some silly throw away post will get a lot of responses. It just depends on how a post strikes you at a certain time.

I don't take offense if I post and no one responds; you just go on and post again; eventually someone will respond.

Kim

[FearofH2O]

Have there been times when I've felt I could be critical of Clay? Sure. But what did I do? Almost in every instance, on a message board -- I said nothing. Nothing. It's not that I didn't feel like saying something, but I was raised in the "if you can't say anything good, don't say anything" kind of thing. Is that wrong the wrong kind of attitude to be raised in? I would say if it is within your own family, or even your close friends, it could be. But since I really don't know Clay, I don't feel the need to tell him when I think he's done something wrong, or looks bad, or whatever. I might say something, via email, to a friend, but that honestly is the extent of it.

<snip>

I am the same way. But I might mention it to playbiller.

<snip>

I guess i had hoped that Clay would fall in love and marry someone close to his own age, but in a way, I guess I am not too surprised. Of course, we have not heard anything about marriage nor had a confirmation to the gossip.

Anyway/regardless, I am going to do a little armchair analysis here.......

this is all just my OPINION......

....Clay has trust issues, particularly with women and particularly since he has become famous. Wait, don't forget about Clive!

....I don’t think he yet sees himself as handsome when he looks in the mirror.

..... I think that Clay has found Jaymes to be a person he can trust, communicate with, trust, share with, trust, love, trust. . and a person that loves him with their whole being.

...... I do think that Clay loves Jaymes...... but I have no idea if he is IN love.

..... it is a shame that age seems to a factor for some (me included).........

Some friends of my parents married..... she was around 20 years older than him. They never had children, but had a very happy marriage and he loved her dearly. This was 50 years ago........ and yes, they were talked about.

Toldforthis, I was teasing about Clive. Clay has no control over who or when he falls in love. It's just gonna happen. I wish my #2 son hadn't married his wife but I wasn't asked so life goes on

.

The first time I went out with my husband I knew it was different than any other date I had been on. I just didn't know why until later. This year we will have been married 43 years.

I had a client who was late forties, early fifties and was married to a 25 year old. It was her second marriage. She eventually left him for a real estate mogul in NYC. Sorry to say that's when her problems began after she remarried .

[Couch Tomato]

You people are so sweet - I personally decide that the people I normally disagree with have finally seen the light and soon will be obeying my every command!

you are indeed one of a kind

[djs111]

So Clayzor doesn't think Jaymes is good enough for Clay and then other posters come on and say Clay isn't good enough for Jaymes. And somehow that's not insulting? Why, because she's a Foster, because she's a record producer, because she's an older woman?

This was taken out of context, but I see Couchie addressed that.

Trying to regulate how someone feels and how someone expresses themselves is not being an open minded board where different opinions are welcomed. What difference should it make to any of you how another poster feels or thinks about a situation?

She's as entitled to think what she wants about this situation as you are.

Disagreeing is not telling someone how to think. If the expectation when posting something very negative or positive is to change other posters' minds, IMO that is not going to happen. When anyone posts, people will agree, disagree, or just not be moved to comment. I never see posts telling people WHAT to think, I just see posts disagreeing with this or that.

Of course she is entitled to think what she wants. She is not entitled to agreement. Disagreement is not regulating. So if someone posts something that other posters disagree with, they can expect to be ignored or disagreed with, no?

Oh, and I wasn't born. I came out of the sea foam on shore of a Greek island. What.

I can vouch for this - there is proof right here in my back yard (we did not have cameras in those days). Scarlett, I promise to pressure-wash the algae off ya, real soon, okay?

[HeidiHo]

I said, once upon a time, to Couchie I believe, that I felt like everyone was ignoring my posts. I then followed that with a "I'm not hurt by it, I kind of feel it's my own fault because I've not really been involved in the community for a while." And that's the way it goes when you're new, or you leave for a while and then come back. It just takes a little while to make an impact sometimes; and sometimes it has more to do with where you fall in a given conversation. I don't think there is typically a nefarious reason for not getting responses.

I HAVE felt, in the past, that there is a bit of a pile on mentality when it comes to perceived slights toward Clay. When someone posts that they don't like the blond and it is immediately followed by 15 affirmations of the wonder of blond hair (sometimes coupled with comments about how they don't understand why "some people" always complain about the hair), I can see where it can be a bit tough to take. But at the end of the day an individual is responsible for how they react to those perceived pile ons. Frankly, I adopt a KAndre-type attitude. Their problem, not mine - unless I make it mine. Sorry KAndre is I mis-represent what I get from your posts. <g>

[Ansamcw]

What is it about Clay that brings out all these emotions in people....

Heidi...your post made me think cos I also had some eye opening experiences with my friends in the Philippines who are constantly surrounded by gay friends. They were certainly not PC in talking about people's sexuality and insisting on the superiority of their gaydar. I think this developed because their gay friends are constantly talking about who are in the closet and talk bitchy critical about everyone. I found that it was part of that particular gay culture and it was tough for me to get used to that. I was just thinking that if I never got into this Clay fandom then I will probably be just like them thinking a guy on a hip hop work out video was gay because of the way he dances. I am really very thankful that this fandom has made me more sensitive about certain issues.

Scarlett and KAndre...love ya.

Perma...great point about the timing of what you say. One of the really helpful rules that I found in TWOP and CH was catch up on the posts before you post. At times people need to read the mood of the room before posting.

I am not good at social small talk..I often envy Muski's way of being able to share tidbits of her life with us and always make it so interesting. How Kandre can always be bitchy with humor, how cha cha can share beautiful images with us and ldyjocelyn is great at responding to so many people at one time and always so positive. But thats not me...so I don't try. I just post when something moves me and when I have time in RL so I am sorry if some people do not feel appreciated. I always thought that no one reads my posts in CH because I am usually boring full of analysis and logic...then once in a while I get a pm and someone will tell me they agree ...or when we were in california...I was surprised when several people came to me to thank me for my posts...that was nice. So really...the only way to be part of a community is to take part in it...

[playbiller]

I once told Fear over the phone that I did not like Clay's hair and she yelled at me, so the sharing of what you don't like can be one way in a family, too!

Hair is sensitive tome, I dont' post about it because my opinion about hair changes as I get used to it. I aways hate getting a hair cut it is a week until I can look in a mirror.

I don't expect to like everything about Clay, but what I don't like is usually nothing to do with his music or career, so it is not worth commenting on.

I am bad in that I usually don't quote people unless I disagree with them, it is not personal, but I am always shocked when a few people take it that way. I feel like they are judging me because I responded and that shouldn't be right. Right now I have been quoted and laughed at all over the IDF because I don't get David A. Sorry, but tgrue. So instead of respecting different opinions, you get trahed there. Whatever.

[Cotton]

Interesting conversations going on in here the last couple of days.

Anyway, I have nothing to add.

Stop clapping.

Except I really, really have to agree with one post!!!

Perma's pretty pics! I love Perma's pretty! And she always brings it! :F_05BL17blowkiss:

You got some more pretty today, Perma?

[playbiller]

The Korean clips I put up on 4 shared yesterday have been downloaded 220 times, but this is the only site that acknowledged it. The person who put up the video originally only got 7 responses and then the thread was moved. That is message board life. If someone says what I want to say, I let it stand without wording it, it just is as if I nodded along and you were supposed to understand it. We can all see each other, right, or am I the only one who can see you?

Do you want me to move it to a random unvaulted media thread?

[KAndre]

KAndre wipes away a crocodile tear...

Heidi gets me! She really, really gets me!

Heh.

Chick, you got it in one.

djs, give her a quick blast for me too.

[ToldForThis]

Have there been times when I've felt I could be critical of Clay? Sure. But what did I do? Almost in every instance, on a message board -- I said nothing. Nothing. It's not that I didn't feel like saying something, but I was raised in the "if you can't say anything good, don't say anything" kind of thing. Is that wrong the wrong kind of attitude to be raised in? I would say if it is within your own family, or even your close friends, it could be. But since I really don't know Clay, I don't feel the need to tell him when I think he's done something wrong, or looks bad, or whatever. I might say something, via email, to a friend, but that honestly is the extent of it.

<snip>

I am the same way. But I might mention it to playbiller.

<snip>

I guess i had hoped that Clay would fall in love and marry someone close to his own age, but in a way, I guess I am not too surprised. Of course, we have not heard anything about marriage nor had a confirmation to the gossip.

Anyway/regardless, I am going to do a little armchair analysis here.......

this is all just my OPINION......

....Clay has trust issues, particularly with women and particularly since he has become famous. Wait, don't forget about Clive!

....I don’t think he yet sees himself as handsome when he looks in the mirror.

..... I think that Clay has found Jaymes to be a person he can trust, communicate with, trust, share with, trust, love, trust. . and a person that loves him with their whole being.

...... I do think that Clay loves Jaymes...... but I have no idea if he is IN love.

..... it is a shame that age seems to a factor for some (me included).........

Some friends of my parents married..... she was around 20 years older than him. They never had children, but had a very happy marriage and he loved her dearly. This was 50 years ago........ and yes, they were talked about.

Toldforthis, I was teasing about Clive. Clay has no control over who or when he falls in love. It's just gonna happen. I wish my #2 son hadn't married his wife but I wasn't asked so life goes on

Well, I thought about Clive/RCA after i posted.

I agree about who we fall in love with. At one time, I joked that Clay would probably fall in love with some young twit that was the complete opposite from what he said he was looking for.

[Ansamcw]

I said, once upon a time, to Couchie I believe, that I felt like everyone was ignoring my posts. I then followed that with a "I'm not hurt by it, I kind of feel it's my own fault because I've not really been involved in the community for a while." And that's the way it goes when you're new, or you leave for a while and then come back. It just takes a little while to make an impact sometimes; and sometimes it has more to do with where you fall in a given conversation. I don't think there is typically a nefarious reason for not getting responses.

I HAVE felt, in the past, that there is a bit of a pile on mentality when it comes to perceived slights toward Clay. When someone posts that they don't like the blond and it is immediately followed by 15 affirmations of the wonder of blond hair (sometimes coupled with comments about how they don't understand why "some people" always complain about the hair), I can see where it can be a bit tough to take. But at the end of the day an individual is responsible for how they react to those perceived pile ons. Frankly, I adopt a KAndre-type attitude. Their problem, not mine - unless I make it mine. Sorry KAndre is I mis-represent what I get from your posts. <g>

I was just going to say something about how this happens at times. Sometimes people posts at the same time and we get several posts saying the same thing and it seems like somebody is getting a pile on.

The other explanation is...maybe there are just a lot of people that like how Clay looks regardless and like to say it. I know I am not one of them...I have finally gotten used to the blonde. There are a lot of times when I don't like a look but I will just let it go, its just not that important to me.