#46: Avoid the crazy, enjoy the good, and chill.

[strummer6]

Coming out of lurkdom again ...

Couchie -

But since she came home yesterday she has been walking withot her walker. HUH? LOL. The body is a wondrous thing. It's like she's better after this stroke then she was before it once she got through it.

This is wonderful news!

And though belated, {{hugs}} to ldyj and family. And am nodding in agreement on your post.

Re Da Dinner - I never expected anything else, even before it was changed because of the concert cancellation. It was the same with the Spam cast dinners - no recaps, nothing. Totally understandable to me.

I mean, I know how I would feel sitting down to dinner with a bunch of folks and then have try to be my normal self, knowing that afterwards whatever was said was going to hit a whole bunch of message boards. Shit, I'd probably have a panic attack and not be able to talk, much less eat. Add to that there were non-public figures at the table (knowing, being employed or related to Clay does not make someone a public figure, IMO). And if I were hosting, I'd be thinking of them as well. And if my Mom had been at such a dinner, I would have frantically asking "Don't quote my mother! Please!" A lot.

She's a bit eccentric. Heh.

As for the blogging, yeah, it would be nice to have more of those. But I get what KAndre said. I started a blog at the OFC. That sucker is so dead in the water, maybe three years since I've written one. I kept meaning to ...

I also get it's supposed to be part of the OFC experience, getting blogs from Clay and that's a whole different thing. But I just can't get angry or upset about it. (SparkArt alone would be an entirely different post ...)

Hello everyone! Hope it was a happy Wednesday!

Back to lurking. Or semi-lurking. Whatevah.

[merrieeee]

I mean, some people in my life have no good excuse for 'not knowing' certain things because they have been told over and over and over. They can tell me I'm crazy or I didn't get their full attention first or that I'm imagining we talked about it or that I was unclear...but...I was in the room when the conversations took place, you know? I can postpone anger and be endlessly patient and just gloss over these 'misunderstandings' again and again, using one of the listed reasons...but...at some point, I have to trust my reality: We talked. They really do know. Finally, I feel justified acting on that information.

OK OK 00lsee I'll listen the next time you come over.....I promise

[00lsee]

OK OK 00lsee I'll listen the next time you come over.....I promise

Bwah...I thought of you last night at Kroger when I saw they now have canned "Pudding" and "Spotted Dick". LOL

couchie

Of course even if there is a thread doesn't mean he read it.

True!

Oh, speaking of presidential stuff, I got something interesting via email this morning, too:

I thought it was pretty cool.

[merrieeee]

Bwah...I thought of you last night at Kroger when I saw they now have canned "Pudding" and "Spotted Dick". LOL

OMG Spotted Dick...my favourite dessert! Just love it covered with hot custard . To die for!

[bottlecap]

My shorthand take on the boards today:

The literary version -

Now is the winter of our discontent...

The LOL Cat version -

[muskifest]

00lsee, re: whether Clay 'knows' or not about how fans feel about his blogging. I think it was CH where I read someone saying that the 'higher ups'? (mods?) at OFC told Team Clay this very thing before and TC said they knew (and had passed on the info?) but had 'given up'.

I don't really CARE about what was said at dinner! I'm not just saying that, either! So that's all a moot point for me.

I DO wonder about the so-called 'FanClub', though. Don't get it, really. Evidently, Clay doesn't either! Just not sure what he/Team Clay SHOULD say is part of the 'benefits' of membership if there's really no intention to actually...you know, deliver them.

Now, of course, what I REALLY want Clay to deliver is something he'd no doubt refuse to, but I'd certainly be willing to do him talk him into it...

Couchie...yeay for MobileMamaCouchie! And yep, that body thing...my mom uses a cane, except when she forgets where she left it after being reminded that she uses a cane since she forgets that, too.

ETA: merrieee

OMG Spotted Dick...my favourite dessert! Just love it covered with hot custard . To die for!

Indeed....I suppose you COULD call 'freckles', 'spots', now couldn't you? Yumyum

[spikesmom]

Well, you all have said it much better so I'll just say Hmm, maybe having no access at work all day isn't a bad thing. Keeps my posts shorter! Heh.

My shorthand take on the boards today:

The literary version -

Now is the winter of our discontent...

The LOL Cat version -

[djs111]

Bwah! to bottlecap!!!!

Couchie, that is awesome about your mom!!!!

I agree that if Clay is not gonna do the OFC stuff, it should be taken out.

I did not rejoin the OFC - partly because of money problems, partly because I did not feel like scraping the money together to read a bunch of harsh nasty crapola.

The year I did belong, I often wondered if being a fan was some sort of unpleasant job for some people. Blargh.

[claylove]

I say this with great love for Clay...

Clay will blog when Clay wants to, not because he's told to.

I really don't see the point of bitching at the OFC about it, and possibly causing him to dig his heels in even longer, but whatever floats their boat. Personally I am just gonna be patient and wait until he is ready to share.

In the meantime, thanks for all the pretties that have been posted lately :-)

[merrieeee]

From CV:

Hi CV. I'm finally home. I think I floated from Raleigh to Rhode Island. It didn't even feel like I was in a plane.

I feel like I have about 3 million words I need to get out of my brain and into this post. Unfortunately, I'm exhausted and must take a shower, go to bed, and sleep so I can start my classes in the morning (I cut yesterday, hee).

So I can only say a little bit of all those words and hope I don't do too badly. I've been reading for a couple of hours all over the place and not linearly, following links from the index thread, focus thread, nested quotes, etc. I did read a lot last night and commented a few times under terter's login.

The first thing I have to say is a sincere thank you to all who posted, PM'd and emailed me last night and today. This is such a special place indeed! The second thing I have to say is that I understand how many of you feel who are a little (or a lot) upset about the fact that we can't actually give any specifics of our conversation last night. Believe me, if I had been sitting in my seat refreshing for hours, pacing back and forth, I would have been a little more than disappointed about what I finally read. But I think I would have understood, or at least understood, why it had to be that way. and I'm sure I would have been too chicken to say anything about it.

Our group post from last night took over an hour to write, believe it or not. I lost count of how many times Toni read it back to us and how much discussion went on over each word, from all 10 of us! She was very brave (and askeered) to press the submit button! We have all agreed wholeheartedly to keep all conversation among ourselves. So if you ever hear any "insider scoop" about last night, it won't have come from one of us. (I hope)

I did have a couple of posts quoted but (of course) lost them all. Rats. there were a couple of comments that were so right on and I am too tired to remember them. So I'll try to badly paraphrase. BAF and Kristy were devastated about the cancellation. They immediately offered us tickets for the following night and promises to defray our extra expenses. Unfortunately I and a few others could not stay the extra time. I told the others to go and enjoy but (being the good CVers they are) refused. All for one. We sang! When I spoke with Kristy she explained their dilemma: legally that have to honor the offer from the auction. They can't do anything else but fulfill their promise. I made it clear back to her that (a) we as a group didn't give a rat's ass about the Celine concert (sorry Celine) ( whatever they offered had to be yesterday and not today © it had to include all of us and (d) it had to include Clay for at least 2 hours. I suggested a restaurant (most were close due to weather), a meeting room, a board room, Clay's house, and a few other locations. She took it all in and said "I'll have to get back to you" and I thanked her and hung up quickly. This was at around 3:30 or 4 I think.

It took her over an hour to get back to us. We were all sitting in Toni et al's room all this time. All 10 of us. It was a trip! She called back with 2 options: (1) go tomorrow night; we'll cover costs or (2) We can spend one hour with Clay eating and talking. The group gasped at the one hour, from 6-7). I asked for 1 1/2 hours. Problem is Clay and Jerome are timid about driving in "weather." Hee Southerners. [who knew I was such a good negotiator? not me]. I selected Option 2 and she said she'd get back to me if they could find a hotel. Waited and waited. And waited and waited. And waited and waited. At 6:05 she FINALLY called back. OK you can have your option: Dinner at a restaurant (I don't know its name but it's not a secret as far as I'm concerned; I just don't know it but it starts with "M" IIRC), Clay will sign one thing, Jerome will take pictures and send us a CD. No cameras, No recording devices allowed. No cell phones. Kristy said Clay wanted it to be intimate and not all distrupted by media collection and he wanted to just be able to relax with us and be ourselves. Finally I had to sign a waiver accepting the "lesser prize" [did she forget about the rat's ass???]

OK. We agreed bundled into cars and off we went!

So that's the back story. Clay really didn't want to have to analyze anything he said. He just wanted it to be fun and "extra special" for us because of what we were "giving up." We were a little upset about the cameras. We got over it. FAST!

I didn't bring anything (to Raleigh) to sign! Never thought of it. So I have an IOU. I'll scan and post it after I finish this.

-----------------------------------

So the only other thing I have time to add is this interesting bit: while we were recapping and eeeee-ing et cetera, Someone remembered something. Repeated it. About 4 people remembered 4 different versions of the exact same thing. We had a lengthy discussion and finally agreed to disagree on two different interpretations. And we were all there and all heard it. YIKES!!!! we said. Can you imagine if we actually posted the actual words how hard it would be for anyone on the boards reading it to "get it?" So much of Clay is facial expressions and vocal expressions. We heard it; we couldn't agree.

You see the problem? In this way, I'm actually kinda happy he made his rules!!!! (and HE made the rules; not Jerome. Nothing was stated as off limits and nothing went un-answered

--------------------

God I hope this helps and doesn't hurt things. I love Clay more than I ever have before. Truly. GULP! Don't hate me if any of this came out wrong.

We all ate very very slowly. And I started the coffee ordering. Thanks for reminding me. The time limit wasn't because of the weather, really. It was actually because the restaurant wanted to close early. We stayed as long as we could. Clay didn't really seem to want to leave either! (IMO -- or wishful thinking)

And now for muski:

Believe it or not, I just learned that one of the ideas that was being bandied about was possibly bowling with Clay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Couch Tomato]

Bwah lesser prize?

let's see..dinner with Clay or staring at Clay while Celine was singing something or other.

[Clayzy]

From CV:

<snip>

When I spoke with Kristy she explained their dilemma: legally that have to honor the offer from the auction. They can't do anything else but fulfill their promise. I made it clear back to her that (a) we as a group didn't give a rat's ass about the Celine concert (sorry Celine) (cool.gif whatever they offered had to be yesterday and not today © it had to include all of us and (d) it had to include Clay for at least 2 hours. I suggested a restaurant (most were close due to weather), a meeting room, a board room, Clay's house, and a few other locations. She took it all in and said "I'll have to get back to you" and I thanked her and hung up quickly. This was at around 3:30 or 4 I think.

It took her over an hour to get back to us. We were all sitting in Toni et al's room all this time. All 10 of us. It was a trip! She called back with 2 options: (1) go tomorrow night; we'll cover costs or (2) We can spend one hour with Clay eating and talking. The group gasped at the one hour, from 6-7). I asked for 1 1/2 hours. Problem is Clay and Jerome are timid about driving in "weather." Hee Southerners. [who knew I was such a good negotiator? not me]. I selected Option 2 and she said she'd get back to me if they could find a hotel. Waited and waited. And waited and waited. And waited and waited. At 6:05 she FINALLY called back. OK you can have your option: Dinner at a restaurant (I don't know its name but it's not a secret as far as I'm concerned; I just don't know it but it starts with "M" IIRC), Clay will sign one thing, Jerome will take pictures and send us a CD. No cameras, No recording devices allowed. No cell phones. Kristy said Clay wanted it to be intimate and not all distrupted by media collection and he wanted to just be able to relax with us and be ourselves. Finally I had to sign a waiver accepting the "lesser prize" [did she forget about the rat's ass???]

Poor Celine!

Blogs or no blogs (heck, I couldn't read 'em anyway!), bow ties or green sweaters, too much makeup--who cares? :sm227: Why read that story and go... "Where the frick is my recap??? I'm a fan, I deserve a recap of their private dinner!"? Just read it and remember that Clay's magic turned one hour into three! The man can bend time, for Pete's sake! What more than be said?

[tribeca]

Bwah lesser prize?

let's see..dinner with Clay or staring at Clay while Celine was singing something or other.

now all the people going to Golfing For inclusion are praying for snow

[merrieeee]

The lesser prize! Clay must have thought he was in second place again!!

now all the people going to Golfing For inclusion are praying for snow

but only AFTER we get there!

[FearofH2O]

ldyj, excellent post and it showed sympathy to those who are having a problem with this. I'm not as happy or accepting as a lot of you on here, although not as bent out of shape as some. I am disappointed and I was upset but much of that has to do with many of my own issues. I have always felt like an outsider, for many reasons, but usually I can deal with it because some of the people who've excluded me were people I wouldn't want to hang around with anyway. Cheerleaders and exclusive country club members come to mind. However, when I feel excluded by someone I respect and care about, it brings up all those rejection issues and it hurts.

I realize that Clay may have very valid reasons for not wanting his words repeated, and what I have read here has made me understand that, but it doesn't stop me from feeling left out again. Usually I don't have a problem with people getting m&g's or getting to go to gatherings but when it starts feeling like some type of exclusive club where the same people, over and over, get the priviledges, I do wind up having some problems with resentment. I wish that wasn't the case but it is. Especially when not only do I feel like I haven't been invited to the party, but I also can't even look in the window and enjoy it vicariously. Hope that makes sense to some of you.

Now for the next few days, I think I'll stay from the one board, since I don't need to feed my own insecurities anymore than they already are. Hopefully, you stronger people can bring over anything newsworthy in the meantime.

With all that being said, I'm not going anywhere. Clay is still a class act to me. He went out of his way to make the night special for the people there and for xxx4clay, who couldn't be there.

I think you have to realize that you are not alone in being left out. This group was only ten fans who are willing to spend a large amount of money to meet Clay. The group at the table where I was sitting tried to bid on the concert but no one was willing and/or could afford to pay such a large amount of money. I would say there are very few fans who could afford this. If it makes all of us who can't afford it outsiders so be it. But that makes 99.999% of fans outsiders. In the long run they helped more children than most of us could have.

I don't think Clay's blogging or lack thereof is chasing fans away, it is the jealousy of other fans towards each other. Some people will always get more attention than others. Some just work harder at getting close to Clay and they deserve it. At another board someone accused the group that had dinner with Clay of getting on line and telling all their friends while refusing to tell the mainstream fans. Oy! I don't ever know whether to laugh or cry.

I probably say this everytime I get ticked at the usual complainers, there are little kids who don't have basic things: books, warm clothing, healthy food, dental care. One of the little girls I tutor, was telling me today that she played in the snow but her hands got cold. I asked her if she wore her gloves. She looked at me oddly and said that she wore socks on her hands. The other little girl has all her baby teeth rotten and never looks me in the eye.

Couchie, good for your mom.

[annabear]

Did I tell ya'll mom is home. You wanna know the weird part. Before she left she was walking with a walker. She had some very scary days last week. But since she came home yesterday she has been walking withot her walker. HUH? LOL. The body is a wondrous thing. It's like she's better after this stroke then she was before it once she got through it.

YAY! for MamaTomato! How are you doing, Couchie? Feeling better?

From CV:

Clay really didn't want to have to analyze anything he said. He just wanted it to be fun and "extra special" for us because of what we were "giving up."

I love that & I love Clay Aiken.

As I said elsewhere, this is one instance where Clay's sense of time (we all remember his definition of "soon" *g*) really paid off, turning a 1 1/2 hour dinner into 3 hours!

[muskifest]

And now for muski:

Believe it or not, I just learned that one of the ideas that was being bandied about was possibly bowling with Clay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

merrieee, what does this MEAN? Why would this bit about bowling with Clay be for ME?

Oh. Wait. I get it.

I'd want to go bowling with Clay so that I could finally get my hands on Clay's balls, right?

Oh, you are the naughty one, merrieee

(and quite right )

[luckiest1]

Well, I don't know about anyone else, but I'm quite satisfied with the "recaps" we've been given about the dinner. Sounds v.v. cool to me! One day, one day, my time will come........hee, I keep telling myself that. Don't know why, because I know I'll never have that kind of disposable income. And I'm never gonna win the lottery, cuz I don't buy tickets.

About the OFC......I join to support Clay. I don't read the message boards, I don't even consider them a factor in whether or not to join, because they are optional to read. I just like to be able to go and read Clay's blogs when he writes them, buy tickets on presale when they are available, and enter any contests that are open to Canadians. I even wear the t-shirts, frame the 8x10's, and use the chapstick. If that makes me easy, so be it. I'm sure no one here is very surprised.

ETA: From toni7babe at CH

Since claym8 doesn't remember the name of the resturant........... it was Maggianos.

[FromClaygary]

ETA: Actually, y'know who I feel sorry for? The one person in the group who lives in the area and was added at the last moment to replace xxx4clay; apparently she was not notified of the change in plans and missed it. Now....disclaimer here! That's how I'm reading her posts...I could be completely, totally wrong....but can you IMAGINE how you'd feel missing that opportunity??

Sorry to just jump in after not posting for awhile, but I wanted to correct this. All of the 10 were there. The person who took xxx's place does not live in the Raleigh area, although her screen name might make people think so. A picture was posted of the whole group taken right after the dinner and they were all there.

Oh, I'm so glad! Thanks for the correction! I can't imagine how awful that would have been.

[merrieeee]

Now now muski that's not what I was thinking at all....err....I was thinking how you would get a good look at his rear!!! Yep that's it.

[Claygasm]

My 2 cents (and you know what's that's worth these days...) on keeping secrets from the dinner are these:

1) I don't think it was fair of Clay to ask that of the fans there since he has to know how much the poor underprivileged fans who can't afford to spend $26000 for something would want to share in that evening and what a bad position it would put them in and since I doubt he revealed anything too super-seekrit or personal, I don't see why he asked that of them.

2) I would think that those who went would want to share with us poor underprivileged folks because of their generous spirit so again I think it wasn't fair - or even nice - of Clay to ask that of them.

3) BUT Clay having asked them, I respect that they are honoring his wishes....

4) BUT I suspect that much of those super-seekrit conversations are being shared off the boards between friends and via PMs and that pisses me off. I have NO DOUBT that is happening. None. Maybe not by everyone involved, but it is happening. And those they are telling will decide to share with a few of their special friends who will share with their special friends and on and on. And each time the story is told, it will change.... Well, you know the drill. We have ALL seen this happen before in this fandom and it never ends well. Seems to me it would have been a lot better to just let them share and then its out there on the boards where those involved would be more likely to be accurate in their report.

5) BUT ultimately it is Clay's decision and Clay's choice so what I or anyone else thinks really doesn't matter. This fandom - just like the real world - has always been a fandom of the "haves" and the "have nots" - the chosen few and the rest of us. That's life. Doesn't help to whine about it or get upset about it. It is what it is. Being a "have not" myself, I have to say I do get tired of the same people being the chosen ones over and over but they have the bucks and I don't so what are you going to do?

6) I am not in this fandom to become Clay's friend or confidant or pen pal or to be recognized by him when he sees me in my usual front row seat at his concerts/shows (<snark>). I am here just to drool when he looks hot, swoon when he sings, laugh when he cracks a joke and smile when he smiles. That's all. I don't need to spend big bucks to feel special and I don't feel like a lesser fan because I don't. I just feel special because I AM his fan and that's enough for me.

7) That said, I am curious as hell as what was said at that dinner and I wish to hell Clay hadn't been such a little shit and told those there to keep their mouths shut!!!!!

[djs111]

I am here just to drool when he looks hot, swoon when he sings, laugh when he cracks a joke and smile when he smiles. That's all. I don't need to spend big bucks to feel special and I don't feel like a lesser fan because I don't. I just feel special because I AM his fan and that's enough for me.

Heeeee.

The big bucks went for charity, it could just as easily been from some corporation.

[muskifest]

Now now muski that's not what I was thinking at all....err....I was thinking how you would get a good look at his rear!!! Yep that's it.

Nope, not me....I've never been particularly fixed on that part of Clay's anatomy (although I must admit that Spamalot dancing has made his ass quite a lot more appealing ) No, I'd be watching how he'd manipulate those long, flexible fingers in the holes and then curve that insanely long, tapered thumb over the slick surface of the ball. He'd stand there and bite his lip as he concentrated. Maybe he'd wiggle his fingers a little in the holes to find the best fit and then....and then.....

[liney23]

ahhhhh.... muski prose!

I loved what they did share about the dinner and am not surprised in the least that Clay asked for it to be private. He wanted to enjoy himself and he wanted his family to enjoy themselves. I do hope to see pictures, tho. If not, s'ok!

[smittenwithclay]

oh my..isnt not being a fan of clays butt grounds for dismissel??

(just in case that isnt clear, I am joking lol)