#52: "He doesn't need the spotlight. He just glows."

[Scarlett]

jmh, strange things to be thankful for. *nodnods*

I must say though that things I miss the most about my Dad are what used to drive me up the walll!

ETA: BTW, I was able to find a 4-cup rice cooker last night and that should be ok. Should have thought to get one in Japan (or asked KAndre to pick up one) since they have 1-cup and 2-cup pots over ther. Would have loved to have yours!

ETAA: Eeeep, I'm so late for services... *runs*

EYATA: Ok, I give up. I guess I can't make it to something that starts at 10:30 am if I leave the house at 10:35 -- unless I drive faster than the speed of light. *sighs*

EOMTTA: Shhhhh! I *did* find a way to travel faster than light... and then I thought to myself, "why stop at 10:30?" So... I'm smack in the middle of the JBT right now and hush all of you, you're talking over his singing. *turns back to the stage*

[calurker]

How very strange and yet comforting , in some way, to realize that so many on this board are experiencing what I am with my Mom and my husband's Dad.

My Mom 84 has Macular degeneration and just recently has lost the majority of her sight..things we all took for granted, she now can no longer do. My husband's father 86 can no longer care for the home he has lived in for so long, due to illness, but refuses to accept the reality of it all. We are scrambling to pull it all together.

I don't believe anyone meant to make fun of anything related to caregiving.My Dad had Alziemer's for the last six years of his life, he did not know who we were. The day he was diagnosed was the beginning of our caregiving experience . It's not easy.......and the journey continues.

desertrose, We're all in there/have been/will be

.

Caregivers know, without a doubt, that this sentence is so very true, but I think if it had not been for the laughter at times WE would have gone over the edge. I think the first time we laughed at Alziemers was the day my Dad filled his pipe with butter. So I do believe it is important to be able to still laugh in the face of it all. My Mom, who now can't see my face, said at least now she won't have to pretend she doesn't notice the colour of my hair when I come from the hairdressers.....for some reason she found this very funny. I did too.....it felt good to laugh.

On a lighter but to me,still stressful note...I am really anxious about getting tickets for the Gala. Is it really going to be a bugger of a time or is everyone just trying to scare the bejeebers out of me? I've never tried for Gala tickets before. Is the name change going to affect getting on to the BAF site? Is it like getting tickets from ticketmaster where they give you a time limit to type in your info?...becuase I almost had a major infarct trying to do that with two fingers.Somebody boost my spirits here...I'm starting to hyperventilate and it's not even the end of July.

[FromClaygary]

On a lighter but to me,still stressful note...I am really anxious about getting tickets for the Gala. Is it really going to be a bugger of a time or is everyone just trying to scare the bejeebers out of me? I've never tried for Gala tickets before. Is the name change going to affect getting on to the BAF site? Is it like getting tickets from ticketmaster where they give you a time limit to type in your info?...becuase I almost had a majoe infarct trying to do that with two fingers.Somebody boost my spirits here...I'm starting to hyperventilate and it's not even the end of July.

calurker, I don't think any of us can answer that for you because prior to the ticket sale they are planning to change the BAF website to the new one~that's why it got put back. So there IS noone who knows what it's going to be like.

In prior years, FWIW....

-it is not like Ticketmaster, with a time limit; however, there is urgency because you want to get your info in there as fast as possible so you don't lose tickets. Is there any chance someone with faster fingers could add you to their ticket list?

-they were using the Yahoo merchandise system to sell tickets...so you "got tickets", but in fact there was no guarantee you actually HAD them until Aron emailed you back saying they had been processed...as the Yahoo system did not always "realize" it was sold out until after it actually was. Is that making any sense LOL? I'm hoping that this year it will work better.

Wish I could relieve your stress! But I bet that didn't help any at all, did it?

I have no clue how many people are planning on coming; but the venue seats around 550 (assuming they're using the same ballroom). Some of those seats will be sold to people who have pre-purchased gold and silver tables. My fairly educated guess from other years is around 20% or 100 seats. Add to that the invited guests who do not purchase seats....around 20? So there'll be about 320 tickets up for grabs on Aug. 11th.

Depending on what happens that day (ie, Aug 11th) I suspect there MIGHT be another alternative for those who want to come, but are unable to get tickets, like was done 2 years ago...ie, a not-a-Gala where the event is streamed in and the participants there are on a video- or cell-cert, but in another venue somewhere close. All the fun of participating with other Clayfans, but not in the actual venue.

[treenuts]

treenuts and desertrose, you probably don't mean any harm but I don't particularly find elderly care and jokes about people's needs as they age to be any laughing matter. I know I am very fortunate to have grown children, good friends, a company that still provides medical care to its retirees and a very active church group that supports its members.

the care team at our church is so efficient that even while I was still an occasional visitor and I just casually mentioned I had been in a hospital, they immediately offered to send people to help me with transportation, food delivery and other needs. Not everyone is that lucky and there are real people out there who need help, don't have the means to pay for special care and have no one to depend on.

this board serves a fandom whose members are at or close to the time when parent care is a critical need. then in a few years, they themselves will need this type of care. who will help provide for them? these are people who have been and continue to be generous with various causes, from mosquito nets to actors' retirement funds to youth camps to safe drinking water.

at some point in our lives we will all find ourselves at the receiving end of this deal, and not necessarily because of age alone. the way the world works is that the strong and independent one day could easily be the weak and the helpless the next.

just mho

ETA: desertrose, :thbighug-1:

I'm sorry, but I did not get this response whatsoever. That was very hurtful. My "sharing" comment was from the heart and I love my mom very much. She is a wonderful person as am I.

content: I'm sure Clay Aiken is a wonderful, caring & sharing person too.

[Scarlett]

treenuts, you were responding to my post where I talked about wanting to help fill the need for care, possibly at my church.

That was an earnest offer and I was hoping to receive suggestions on where to look, organizations that are doing a great job, previous experiences with volunteering at places that provide help and/or match needs with resources, maybe even just general encouragement and advice.

No, I wasn't expecting anyone to say, "Here, have mine." and that's why I posted my response. I don't think there was anything offensive in it but I'm sorry that you felt hurt by it.

[treenuts]

I appreciate your reponse, Scarlett.

My intent was meant as humor with love. It's how I handle stressful situations. If I didn't it would overwhelm me. Sometimes what I think to be obvious perhaps isn't......obviously. lol

ETA - preden and all who are anxiously awaiting the Gala ticket sales, I wish you much LUCK!!

I think it's going to be a very HOT TICKET and I hope they make allowances for the additional fans who are desparate to see and hear him as well as support the foundation. Maybe they are working on adding some additional space? One could hope. I won't be able to participate/attend but I'll be thinking of all of you

[preden]

I'm also anxious about purchasing a ticket to the gala but I'm trying to be confident it will all work out. I"m so looking forward to this trip.

[wandacleo]

My mom lived with me for 17 years before she died at 98. She had Alzheimer's disease for the last 10 years, so I know all about caregiving and the need for a giant sense of humor! She broke her hip at 95 and didn't understand and wouldn't cooperate and wouldn't stay in bed at the convalescent hospital where she was supposed to have rehab, so I brought her home on the third day after surgery and had a physiotherapist come to the house. After a night with Mom trying to climb out of bed and yelling all night, the therapist came and asked how I was doing, and I told her I was trying hard to decide whether it would be better to kill myself or Mom. I'll never forget the look on her face!!!

Humor. Black humor. Outrageous humor. It's the love that counts.

[Scarlett]

Sadly, there are no guarantees with ticket-buying, especially with an unknown site.

The problem with this event is that normally, a non-profit fundraiser can be handled by a small, relatively low-cost web storefront. However, the fandom has been known to bring large sites like Ticketmaster or TicketsNow to its knees, and gobble up the smaller sites for breakfast. It's ridiculous for a relatively small foundation to have to use and tack on Ticketmaster charges for a gala. However, a ticket-buying fiasco is the last thing a newly-renamed/remodeled organization wants to have for its first big event.

Unless other events are announced and unless the venue is expanded, the demand for this one will greatly exceed capacity and there will be disappointed people. I hope not to be one but even the fastest fingers aren't foolproof. It would be good if the new organization could send out a survey to gauge interest so that it could take whatever steps it can, if it can still do anything beyond sending an "expectations-setting" e-mail at this late stage, to meet majority of the demand (if possible 2/3rds to 3/4ths) while acknowledging that there will be people who will not be able to attend.

ETA: There's a cute game called Typing Maniac on fb, in case anyone wants to hone their skills!

[calurker]

Thanks so much for giving me a bit of insight....am I still nervous...YOU BETCHA !!!

[preden]

Thanks so much for giving me a bit of insight....am I still nervous...YOU BETCHA !!!

Totally understand how you are feeling! but we will make through!!!

make it through I mean!!

[luckiest1]

I guess all this gala angst made me have a dream about it! But as usual, it was a strange dream....not so much reality. There was a huge line up for tickets, just to get in. They were $250 each (at least that much was real, LOL). I was with cindilu2 and goldarngirl but somehow they'd left me holding the place in line, and I was up to the table and panicking, trying to text them to get back! Anyways, the way this weird line worked, you had to pick a dress to wear from their rack of dresses. By the time I got up to the front, we were the last 3 tickets available so we had to take what was left. I know someone (not me!) ended up in a wedding dress. As luck would have it, I got the last outfit.....pants and a Clay shirt dating back to 2004. Hey, at least we got tickets! AND they upgraded us to VIP because of the poor dress selection. :lmaosmiley-1:

[jamar1700]

As I often tell ducky...dreams are like free entertainment ...

Case in point....I dreamed I was on a date with Cory Feldman the other night. Where in the world did that come from? Cory Feldman?

[aikim]

I had a dream about Clay last night....he blogged about getting his shoes repaired :8:

I really am a :28:...not even smutty dreams about Clay!

96 Days until The BAF Gala!

Everyone have a great day!

Kim

[goldarngirl]

I guess all this gala angst made me have a dream about it! But as usual, it was a strange dream....not so much reality. There was a huge line up for tickets, just to get in. They were $250 each (at least that much was real, LOL). I was with cindilu2 and goldarngirl but somehow they'd left me in holding the place in line, and I was up to the table and panicking, trying to text them to get back! Anyways, the way this weird line worked, you had to pick a dress to wear from their rack of dresses. By the time I got up to the front, we were the last 3 tickets available so we had to take what was left. I know someone (not me!) ended up in a wedding dress. As luck would have it, I got the last outfit.....pants and a Clay shirt dating back to 2004. Hey, at least we got tickets! AND they upgraded us to VIP because of the poor dress selection. :lmaosmiley-1:

Hey we got in and VIP tickets too? Weeeeeee. Nothing wrong with that dream at all. Not too sure about the wedding dress but hey a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.

[luckiest1]

Yep, I'm taking the dream as a sign.

Interesting article about new technology for Broadway shows, from Ms Marm at CH via dancermom2 at CV:

http://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/story?...0978&page=1

ETA this post about a new montage, from CV, which I have not had the chance to watch, but it's getting rave reviews!

Good morning, CV!

I wonder why I have such a hard time focusing at work, and yet I can spend one solid weekend doing nothing but working on a Clay Aiken montage. It's a mystery.

Anyway, here it is, hours in the making, my epic mashup (YouTube link):

(warning - it's 10 minutes long)

[bottlecap]

Moby was in the "30 Rock" finale, and in an interview with CNN he said:

CNN: You were involved in the season finale of [the NBC program] "30 Rock." Are you a fan?

Moby: Yeah. I got a call asking if I wanted to be a part of the season finale. And I didn't have to think. ... If they had said, "Would you like to come and clean the toilets on set?" I would've said yes.

It's cool that Clay got to participate in the musical finale and it's way cool that people are still talking about it months later. Tina Fey - you need to include Clay in more stuff. How about writing a part for him in your next movie?

[preden]

I guess all this gala angst made me have a dream about it! But as usual, it was a strange dream....not so much reality. There was a huge line up for tickets, just to get in. They were $250 each (at least that much was real, LOL). I was with cindilu2 and goldarngirl but somehow they'd left me holding the place in line, and I was up to the table and panicking, trying to text them to get back! Anyways, the way this weird line worked, you had to pick a dress to wear from their rack of dresses. By the time I got up to the front, we were the last 3 tickets available so we had to take what was left. I know someone (not me!) ended up in a wedding dress. As luck would have it, I got the last outfit.....pants and a Clay shirt dating back to 2004. Hey, at least we got tickets! AND they upgraded us to VIP because of the poor dress selection. :lmaosmiley-1:

LOL!!!

[Couch Tomato]

Lucky thanks so much for the laugh!!

[wandacleo]

I went to the AI concert with my Clay buddy CJ last night and thought of CouchieMama and cheered extra loud for Adam (NOT that I needed to as every time even a slight picture of him flashed on the screen the crowd went berserk). It was fun to see people as thrilled to see Adam as we are all thrilled to see Clay. I'll give a brief recap here, WARNING, so you can scroll if you hate all things AI and/or Adam.

The stage has a big screen all the way behind it, screens on the sides, and jumbotrons AND coordinated video and light shows on the screens (and in the air) throughout. The sound system in San Jose was lousy--too loud, somewhat muffled, so it was hard to hear what people said--lots of bass. The singers sang some stuff from AI, but a lot was new--and better. They presented the singers as a countdown from #10 to #1, with the first singers getting a couple of songs and the later ones getting 3 or 4--varied. Michael was typical lounge singer. Megan was blah. CJ didn't like her either--nor did anyone around us. Anoop sang one song and then said something we couldn't understand and put on Buddy Holly glasses for the rest of the night. Lill was good--but not very distinctive. I thought Scott (who rose up from the floor with his piano) was considerably better than he had been on AI--maybe because he started with a good rocking song and did well. He and Matt later rose up with TWO pianos and played duets. Matt was good.

Each singer got a few seconds to give a personal greeting--Adam just thanked everyone for support, and most did a similar spiel, but Danny talked about how his wife died and when she had surgery she had a 90% chance of survivival and died......He got a bit emotional talking about how you have to go on after tragedy and follow your dreams. It all seemed a little strange in the middle of the rock celebration, but I guess he's still dealing with his grief. I've never particularly liked Danny's singing, and I found him a little boring. Allison rocked--she's quite good and she and Adam later sang Slow Ride (fantastic).

The place went wild when Adam came out and he was like electric after the rest of the show. He was writhing, thrusting, and dancing all over that stage. Sometimes it was hard to hear him for the screams (sound familiar??) Lots of kids in the audience and they clearly loved him. I was hoping he'd sing Black/White but he didn't. Mad World was mad good and one of the few songs I could actually hear clearly. He started with a long jacket--hair in a pompador--and after a couple of songs he threw the jacket and (CROWD SCREAMING) he was wearing a sleeveless V-neck tight shirt. He sang Fame and was great. (I like the guy.) One BIG problem was the frigging fog machine went wild when he was one stage so you could hardly see him part of the time (CONSPIRACY??????) When he and Allison were singing Slow Ride I could see Adam madly waving his arm back and forth in front of his face at the finale when and Allison are facing each other as I'm sure he could hardly see her.

I felt a little bad for Kris having to follow Adam but the crowd screamed like crazy for him when he came out even though it was more subdued after that. I think everyone wanted him to feel ok about Adam--I know that CJ and I screamed like hell for Kris too. Honestly, I'd always found Kris a little on the milquetoast side on AI, but he held his own. Much better songs and he had the whole crowd on its feet singing along with Hey Jude (smart song choice).

Alll in all, it was a fun time but I could hardly hear for about 3 hours afterward (and I used ear plugs part of the time). I shudder to think about the ear damage occurring to all those young kids in the audience.

[luckiest1]

Thanks for that, wanda. It was fun to read. Glad you had a good time! It sounds quite a bit similar to the AI tour with Clay and Ruben....counting down from #10 to #1, more songs the higher you get, some duets, and the runner up trying not to outshine the winner.

[cha cha trusty]

Just skimming over the last few posts...

We had a ton of people over yesterday, had a ton of food, and had a ton of fun!

On the caregiver homefront, I think I grew up being one. My father was older and divorced from my mother when I was 8, and we subsequently moved in with my maiden aunts, who were older still than my father. At 72, when he got cancer in his liver and a hospital bed was installed in the downstairs room, I became his nurse for the 3 months he lived after the operation. I was 15. My aunts became my guardians. The main one lived a long life and managed to see me through my wedding and birth of twins. She died at age 91 when the twins were 3 months old.

And that's it in a nutshell.

Clay-related -- -- Where is that man???

Loved his blog post about the ejiit in NC...

In more positive news, I heard that DC is now recognising same-sex marriages.

Anyone think Clay will ever marry?

to luckiest, thanks for the links!

In the past week, I've listened to The Half Blood Prince and the Deathly Hallows audio books. I sure it's accted my dreams! I wish I could remember them!

[treenuts]

Anyone think Clay will ever marry?

I really hope so....one day! I think he would need to find someone with similar interests and one who would be happy living a simpler and somewhat quiet life with him in NC during down time first. I hope for his sake and Parker's, one day he has a chance to experience that kind of relationship with his soul mate.

[Couch Tomato]

As I often tell ducky...dreams are like free entertainment ...

Case in point....I dreamed I was on a date with Cory Feldman the other night. Where in the world did that come from? Cory Feldman?

how did I miss this

Wanda - thanks for the recap. To have my mom well..I would have even sat through it myself

[keepingfaith]

Anyone think Clay will ever marry?

I really hope so....one day! I think he would need to find someone with similar interests and one who would be happy living a simpler and somewhat quiet life with him in NC during down time first. I hope for his sake and Parker's, one day he has a chance to experience that kind of relationship with his soul mate.

Personally, my longest-lasting relationship was with a man I refused to marry -- and eventually I kicked his ass out and was sooo glad I didn't have to get a lawyer!! My two marriages were not so hot, and did require lawyers and lots of money. The love of my life I did not marry -- which may be why he remains the love of my life. All in all, marriage is something I'd never do again, but it was convenient for having children.

Speaking of children, I've just come off a couple of weeks of family -- parents, kids, grandchildren, inlaws, outlaws, and all their dogs, cats, horses, bulls, and cattle. Spent most of last week at my DIL's ranch in central Texas. Actually it belongs to her father, but he lives in another state, has hired hands to run it, and my son and DIL spend their every off-hour there. Can you say 105 degrees? I'm still peeling, and I had on 50 sunblock.

Here's a few representative pictures of my Fouth of July --

Arriving ...

The cows were hot too ....

The saving grace was the POOL where we lived for five days ....

Fortunately, no matter how hot it is outside, Texas men love to sweat over a brisket and fajitas!

So we spent minimal in here, hallelujah ...

There are five 4x4's on the ranch so the kids would take off in the early morning

for a roll in the hay ...

I can't believe I got even a distant picture of my oldest granddaughter (with her arms folded) -- she's pissed that I'm taking a picture with her in it, but I had to promise her it would be the only one!

Oh, we had tons of fun ... but did I mention it was HOT!!!!!????