#55: My Eyes Adored You

[justclay12]

Although I probably wouldn't have gone up to Clay to say anything, partly because I'm a chicken shit, I don't see the issue with BFS asking the question. She asked, he let her know that he wasn't going to answer, and she let it go and didn't continue to question him. If she would have continued to badger him with questions, when he had made it apparent he wasn't going to answer them, then that would have been over the line.

I just think sometimes fans can be hard on other fans because their boundaries or personalities are different. Just like when some fans get mad at Ethel or other exuberant fans because Clay gives them attention. We are all different, and one isn't better than the other. If something crosses your boundaries, then don't do it, it's as simple as that. BFS did us a favor by posting her report, which I enjoyed reading, and it bothers me to see other fans criticizing her because she did something that they wouldn't.

[Carolina Clay]

I think we're looking at least until tomorrow or Saturday for the BIG NEWS from Clay. He did say, "in the next several days, or so" and several is at least three, which from Tuesday's blog would be Friday, and "or so" means it could be another day or two give or take. I think weekend is a comfortable prediction -- not that I'm closing my browser window to the OFC in case it's today. No way.

Now as libertine as I can be, I really was uncomfortable reading about the person approaching Clay at the theater. I wouldn't have a problem speaking to him if he were alone in an airport, on the street, in an elevator, etc. But in a restaurant or a theater where he's with friends or family, I couldn't imagine being so bold to think Clay would want to deal with a fan, even a fan he recognizes. A wave from a distance is the MOST I'd give it if he made eye contact. After that, it would be up to him to make a move. I've seen a number of celebrities in my time and most of them are really nice, but the ones I've spoken to have said something to me first. Maybe it's just a Southern thing, but I think it's common manners to respect others' privacy. Just my 2 cents.

ETA - I absolutely agree on the Clay encounter though. Boundaries, people. Boundaries. Who knows though - maybe OFC mods have special dispensation.

She's not an OFC mod anymore. She resigned a few weeks ago. I totally agree with the boundaries.

Caro

[aikim]

Although I probably wouldn't have gone up to Clay to say anything, partly because I'm a chicken shit, I don't see the issue with BFS asking the question. She asked, he let her know that he wasn't going to answer, and she let it go and didn't continue to question him. If she would have continued to badger him with questions, when he had made it apparent he wasn't going to answer them, then that would have been over the line.

I just think sometimes fans can be hard on other fans because their boundaries or personalities are different. Just like when some fans get mad at Ethel or other exuberant fans because Clay gives them attention. We are all different, and one isn't better than the other. If something crosses your boundaries, then don't do it, it's as simple as that. BFS did us a favor by posting her report, which I enjoyed reading, and it bothers me to see other fans criticizing her because she did something that they wouldn't.

And you know what...even though I enjoyed reading the report, I was still uncomfortable with her approaching Clay in that manner and I would have that same level of discomfort if were an unknown fan or Joe the plumber. And I don't see anything wrong with expressing that on a fan board. I think everyone has been respectful.

Personally, I don't get the sense of entitlement that some fans have when it comes to Clay...so because he is a celebrity he isn't entitled to be out with his boyfriend without fans approaching him?

This wasn't a chance meeting...she sought him out and engaged him and from his comment about going back and enjoying the show...well it made be wince...because it just sounded like was uncomfortable and didn't appreciate the intrusion.

I think if she had not gone up to him and just made a report of seeing him that would have been enough.

Kim

[jmh123]

Personally, I'm uncomfortable when I see fans singled out like this by name (or as good as) for criticism. On the other hand, I've come close myself on issues that bug me, and I even crossed the line back in the Fake Clay/RCA hate days, so I'm not without a beam in my eye. I'm just saying that it makes me uncomfortable because this is a public board, and I think it's the kind of thing that ought in most circumstances be discussed directly with that person, rather than behind her back (so to speak) and yet in her face (should she choose to read it). But it may be that I'd feel differently if my personal hot button had been pushed, so I'll give others the benefit of the doubt. Likewise I'll give it to her.

[Couch Tomato]

I don't care about the question she asked..she didn't ask when he and Reed were getting married. He chose not to answer..IMO not as a slap but more because that's just Clay and he's not ready for us to know yet. Sounds like a perfectly reasonable encounter with a celeb.

[ncgurrl]

I don't care about the question she asked..she didn't ask when he and Reed were getting married. He chose not to answer..IMO not as a slap but more because that's just Clay and he's not ready for us to know yet. Sounds like a perfectly reasonable encounter with a celeb.

I think what was said was less of an issue than that Clay had no intention of including HER in HIS private theater experience. A polite hello was not going to be expanded into a discussion of any sort so Clay shut her down quickly.

[justclay12]

I don't care about the question she asked..she didn't ask when he and Reed were getting married. He chose not to answer..IMO not as a slap but more because that's just Clay and he's not ready for us to know yet. Sounds like a perfectly reasonable encounter with a celeb.

I think what was said was less of an issue than that Clay had no intention of including HER in HIS private theater experience. A polite hello was not going to be expanded into a discussion of any sort so Clay shut her down quickly.

That's the key though. Clay handled it, which he is perfectly capable of doing, and he was gracious. He's said that he doesn't mind people coming up to him, and he has answered questions before. If she'd asked him while he was trying to watch the show, that would have been different, but it was while people were being seated.

And I agree with Couchie. It doesn't seem like it should be that big of a deal.

[bottlecap]

I think posters at several boards around the Clay Nation have been way ruder to bfs than she was in daring to make eye-contact and speaking with Clay and Reed.

[FearofH2O]

I think posters at several boards around the Clay Nation have been way ruder to bfs than she was in daring to make eye-contact and speaking with Clay and Reed.

So what else is new? I think Clay has lost way more fans through fan fighting than by his being gay. While I'm in this mood, I also hate the ganging up on a fan who doesn't agree with everyone else. Although if someone appears to have an agenda it's

Here's to a great day for all. Talked to my west coast son, who had surgery on his knee Tuesday, last night and he is feeling less nauseous than before and is getting around on crutches. He has a friend who is a male nurse who is staying with him temporarily until my son feels better and has his current girlfriend bringing him food and her company. I'm having lunch with my local son today so I'm a happy mom today.

Looking forward to Clay news, whenever or whatever. :9:

[aikim]

10 Days until GFI!

36 Days until Clay Speaks at the HRC Convention!

58 Days until The First Day of Spring!

:glasses:

4 and 1/2 months until June and the New CD/PBS Special!

:04:

Happy Birthday to all celebrating!

Everyone have a great day!

Kim

[FromClaygary]

FromClaygary... I'm sorry about your eyes. I have the bare beginnings of Macular Degeneration, but it's so far in the future that I think with vitamins and early treatment, my eyes will be fine as long as I need them to be. I have an aunt with MD and she got some kind of a series of shots that improved her eyesight a lot. They are making strides in vision care all the time. It's amazing what they can do nowdays.

The shots....yes, called Lucent technology; I'm going to be asking about that when I go next time. Likely not applicable to my situation, but I'm asking.

Regarding the strides in vision care~yes, that's my hope too.

Actually what he said was 'You will want to be checking here EVERY day for the next several days or so.' (Caps belong to Clay) To me that implies there would've/could've been news yesterday and today (and tomorrow). I've long come to accept Clay's rather liberal sense of time though. He's always worth waiting for!

I suspect what's happened is that Clay has asked Sparkfart to post something to the website....and we all know how asking them to do something goes! *rolleyeballs*

I don't think he knows any better than any of us how long it's going to take...within a certain timeframe.

Talking of bad eyes. I have a tiny bit of vision on the edge my one eye. The eye is essentially useless. I have adjusted to it as it has been 30 years since I went blind in that eye overnight. My new car has a system where it tells you if anyone is in your blind spot and since on my left side everything is in my blind spot, this works great to help me drive. A little orange light appears in the side mirror to warn me a car is there. I love it and would not want to drive a car without it now.

Hmmm....one of my big stressors has been the thought of losing my license, and therefore my independence. You mean you DIDN'T?????

Personally, I'm uncomfortable when I see fans singled out like this by name (or as good as) for criticism. On the other hand, I've come close myself on issues that bug me, and I even crossed the line back in the Fake Clay/RCA hate days, so I'm not without a beam in my eye. I'm just saying that it makes me uncomfortable because this is a public board, and I think it's the kind of thing that ought in most circumstances be discussed directly with that person, rather than behind her back (so to speak) and yet in her face (should she choose to read it). But it may be that I'd feel differently if my personal hot button had been pushed, so I'll give others the benefit of the doubt. Likewise I'll give it to her.

Exactly.

And I can't imagine how much MORE of a chance encounter it could have been....it's not like she followed them there!

[Carolina Clay]

Late last night I uploaded a new Carolina On My Mind blog that (knock on wood) hit Google within six minutes. Who can figure out that place?!?!?! This is the Facebook plug:

The excited buzz and anticipation levels circulating through Clay Cyberspace are at record levels, matching the singer's enthusiasm for his upcoming CD and PBS Special. Three Not.Just.Us stories and the Inclusion Project's new YouTube channel are featured.

A new graphic by AmazingCA is also in the mix. TNIP urges supporters to register at the organization's new YT channel. Thank you for your support of the Clay blogs.

Clay handled it, which he is perfectly capable of doing, and he was gracious.

That's his southern upbringing.

Happy Friday, all!

Caro

[keepingfaith]

So what else is new? I think Clay has lost way more fans through fan fighting than by his being gay.

Could it be that just because the boards have lost members through fan fighting, that this doesn't necessarily extrapolate to how people feel about Clay?

In 2007, I did my own unscientific survey and made it a point to meet as many people as I could at the shows I attended and asked people I chatted with where they posted, and by far the largest number of people I talked to said they left the boards and didn't post anywhere. Yet they were attending the Summer 2007 concerts and LOVED Clay. Many of them had traveled a long way. There were innumerable people who told me, to paraphrase in general, "I used to post at ________, but it got (too negative) (too clique-y) (too contentious) (too disrespectful to Clay) (too controlled by prima donnas) (you couldn't say anything nice about Clay without having to take cover) (I don't need the grief) -- take your pick I heard a lot. Some people really were, and are, here for Clay more than for other fans.

ETA: Thinking about talking to fans in 2007, I'm reminded of the sweet lady in Houston who isn't on any board. She was attending all by herself that night and told me that her son had brought her and was picking her up, but he wouldn't attend as a matter of principle. She said to me, "My son is gay and he knows that Clay is gay, and he's mad at him for not coming out, so he wouldn't come with me."

So maybe there will be some new audience members next tour? And some new CD purchasers?

[Couch Tomato]

Well I still don't get it. Clay got talked to while out at a public place. So I'm thinking it's the person rather than the situation. If it was some tweet from some unknown person would we be having this conversation or eeeing about a hair and clothes report and happy to know Clay was out and about having fun. I have to say this one is puzzling. Maybe it's because in the last year I've just kinda forgotten most of the fan stuff and my memory is of things way more intense - like you know - him having babies with psycho women or having to call some fans out from the stage. No harm no foul is what comes to mind on this one.

On another note... TGIF. That finally has meaning for me after a year LOL.

[keepingfaith]

Well I still don't get it. Clay got talked to while out at a public place. So I'm thinking it's the person rather than the situation. If it was some tweet from some unknown person would we be having this conversation or eeeing about a hair and clothes report and happy to know Clay was out and about having fun. I have to say this one is puzzling. Maybe it's because in the last year I've just kinda forgotten most of the fan stuff and my memory is of things way more intense - like you know - him having babies with psycho women or having to call some fans out from the stage. No harm no foul is what comes to mind on this one.

On another note... TGIF. That finally has meaning for me after a year LOL.

This just keeps going on because it's NOT about the person, although some seem to want to make it so. And yes, if this had been an anonymous tweet that someone approached Clay in his seat at the theater when he was with Reed and gave him a compliment, and Clay graciously thanked the person for the compliment, and then the person tried to continue the encounter and Clay asked them to take their seat ... would people be discussing that? Hell, yeah. As for me, I merely discussed the general idea of approaching famous people and my boundary definitions. Clay has discussed people who have approached him in public and said in his own words, basically, "You can say hello to me in a restaurant, but don't pull up a chair." Now of course Clay can handle these situations, and probably will be handling these situations for the rest of his life. That's not the point. Would it be "worth it" if an uninvited fan who "pulled up a chair" at Clay's table told me Clay was wearing a red shirt or a purple shirt and was eating clams or steak? Not to me. I don't give a damn. But that's just me. To make it crystal clear, for me it's definitely about the situation and not the person in this or any other instance. In this case, I don't know the person. It's obvious that many of you do. I think the person should be out of this discussion altogether as identities are not pertinent to the subject matter. But there is subject matter.

[keepingfaith]

Saw this headline on a website this morning and had to laugh. Has Clay started a new spelling trend?

Erroll Southers: WH Didn't Through Me Under The Bus

I'm waiting patiently at the OFC today, with no expectations. You know the thing about water not boiling while you watch!

[Kareneh]

NEW BLOG

**I know I can't do it but I'm checking the fare anyway.**

[Lotus]

NEW BLOG

Tongue biting extended but there is news!!!

[justclay12]

He's so funny. It appears we have to wait a little bit longer but he did give us a heads up for when and where, just not what.

[aikim]

Well I still don't get it. Clay got talked to while out at a public place. So I'm thinking it's the person rather than the situation. If it was some tweet from some unknown person would we be having this conversation or eeeing about a hair and clothes report and happy to know Clay was out and about having fun. I have to say this one is puzzling. Maybe it's because in the last year I've just kinda forgotten most of the fan stuff and my memory is of things way more intense - like you know - him having babies with psycho women or having to call some fans out from the stage. No harm no foul is what comes to mind on this one.

On another note... TGIF. That finally has meaning for me after a year LOL.

This just keeps going on because it's NOT about the person, although some seem to want to make it so. And yes, if this had been an anonymous tweet that someone approached Clay in his seat at the theater when he was with Reed and gave him a compliment, and Clay graciously thanked the person for the compliment, and then the person tried to continue the encounter and Clay asked them to take their seat ... would people be discussing that? Hell, yeah. As for me, I merely discussed the general idea of approaching famous people and my boundary definitions. Clay has discussed people who have approached him in public and said in his own words, basically, "You can say hello to me in a restaurant, but don't pull up a chair." Now of course Clay can handle these situations, and probably will be handling these situations for the rest of his life. That's not the point. Would it be "worth it" if an uninvited fan who "pulled up a chair" at Clay's table told me Clay was wearing a red shirt or a purple shirt and was eating clams or steak? Not to me. I don't give a damn. But that's just me. To make it crystal clear, for me it's definitely about the situation and not the person in this or any other instance. In this case, I don't know the person. It's obvious that many of you do. I think the person should be out of this discussion altogether as identities are not pertinent to the subject matter. But there is subject matter.

Excellent post!

Interesting blog...March 12...maybe they pushed the filming of the PBS back? I can't go anyway...but it will be interesting to see what this is all about.

Kim

[bottlecap]

Alert all the Clackgathers to charge up their equipment and get themselves to Raleigh on Friday, March 12th for.... TBD. JUST GO!

[jmh123]

NEW THREAD!