zena

Oh, 'Toots' thank you soooo much for noticing little ol' me and all your concern and stuff. I actually prefer drugs myself, but I may have to supplement my subconscious pity party with a nice tumbler glass or two of Dubonnet wine when my guests arrive at precisely 8 pm tomorrow evening. In the absence of a handy dandy recording device, I may have to excuse myself periodically to the family room. I can always just top up the glasses and fill up the cheese and cracker tray during the commercials, dontcha think? What? It'll just be for the first hour....I'll be the puuurrrrfect hostess the rest of the evening. For the record, we don't get TVO here either..... Another thing, I just can't compete with darling little penguin babies.... :F_05BL17blowkiss: to Grgramma From Claygary. Waves to Scarlett.... yup; still snowin'

Okay, you are all really just tricking me tonight, right? You're just pretending you are actually taking me seriously here? See above quote of zena's brand of humour. ACK....even my jokes aren't funny; i guess they lack at little "crispiosity" (tm YSRN)or or something.... So what can I talk about? Hmmmm. Vegas Nope; already made the mistake of going to that thread and going green with envy. :yapyapyapf: Christmas concerts? Minneapolis; December 19th, 20th, Tickets: check. Flight: check Hotel: check Suitcase packed: check. Nothing more here. But then there's always the .....lots of room for discussin here i think.... what with all the woods swinging and the clubs, balls, holes, oh my goodness , no wonder Clay doesn't play golf. I better write an email to Kristy right now and tell BAF I don't think this is a good idea at all. Gosh, maybe Clay will even read it at Golfing for Inclusion in January. Wouldn't that be just awesome? :2:

zena is shivering all over.... it's freaking snowing at my house. zena contemplates the advantage of falling down glaciers to being 'shaken up' by seismic forces. Nasty weather..... grrrrrr.... I've been missing in action the last few days at FCA, and I could sure do with a few laughs. I just walked in the door and my DH tells me we are getting company tomorrow evening. I am really regretting "lending" my VCR to my kids. And apparently Manitoba doesn't have Honeycrisp apples here either! Life is just not fair. If Clay and Honeycrisp apples were promoted properly they would be available to everyone who wants them;even to those who don't know they want them. Yeah, and snow and earthquakes should be distributed evenly. What's up with that anyway? I need to talk to whoever's in charge. Anyone have a number I can call, or an email address or something? {{{{{Idyjocelyn}}}}} Aw, Muskifest, hang in there..... I so need a nap. Supper? What supper? DH can eat chocolate bars. ......back after midnight to suck your blood...... What?

Well, blow me over, the first day on the new job has started off rather nicely thanks to all of you. So, moooovin on and Up to the deeluxe apartment...in the Big Honey Crisp Apple.... .... here are a few of my favorite things that absolutely bear repeating. Yes, all things being equal I prefer the lighted streets over dark alleys. As long as we don't have facts to base opinions on about these inside-the-business debates, I'll go with common sense, logic and a positive perspective every time, in that order. And this? Snort! Snort! Guffaw! Snort! Sniff. Sorry, but I've never been a "neat" laugher. Oh, Clay, you have noooo 'ahdeeah' how many ways I'd like to help you out, although not so much in the brotherly or cousinly sense, especially when you're 'confused' like you said in your blog just now. Zena could bring a little clarity into your life. Sigh. So what's the scoop at FCA on the subject of the blog; the stories I mean? I've been at the OFC a half dozen time now in the last week (which has got to be an all time record for me), lookin' at the list of rules and checkin' it twice. I have a story written but it's pretty firmly parked in a Word File for now. I wish it was funny....., The only Christmas concerts I will be going to are the two in Minneapolis. Hey, does that mean he will be choosing a different set of three stories for each night in Minneapolis? Never mind, I still at the point where I'd love for Clay to read my story but can't get my head around reading it in public; not because I'm shy but because it hits some pretty vulnerable spots personally. Hugs to Divayenta and KarenEh? They know why. And a little to you keepingfaith, on the "pissy". Goodness know my vocabulary has certainly changed increased since I started frequenting the boards, but I've never been a big fan of the bodily function expletives. On several occasions since my tenure in the Claynation has begun, I have shocked the %#X&* out of my family with some unfamiliar exclamations of well, extreme emotion. I gotta admit, it did elicit a reaction, and a lecture from my 25 year old. :yapyapyapf: It's getting really cold up here. I so wish I was going to Vegas. YIKES!!!!!! I"M AT THE TOP!!! HOLD ME FCA!!!!

So, here it is, the big milestone post; the next one is much too far ahead to see or even believe I'll ever reach. If I do, it will be the most I've ever said on any messageboard. Today, as I was reading some of the truly wise and perceptive takes on the present upward surge and swell of the fandom's tide, I found myself nodding in agreement a lot. But today, I was not especially compelled to try to say again myself what had already been said very articulately. I like that about this board. It feels comfortable enough for me not to have to Word every excellent post; comfortable enough to know that when I actually remember to join the birthday greetings of the day that this means more that I am having a good day than that I have forgotten or don't care about all the others. When I do get on my little soapbox to rant or rave; whatever the case may be; I have, somewhat to my surprise, been heard. And quoted. And pmed. My little posting heart runneth over. I watched Claygasms' Solitaire montage with a reverent and permanent lipbite of my own. And then just a few minutes ago,I peeked through the heads and shoulders of that wired Avery Fischer audience through SLC's lense to let the vision and voice of Clay Aiken fill and overtake my 15 inch computer screen. How can people say, "I've fallen in love again...." For me, it is always still and more in love. He has always been all that he is now, which is much more than he has often been given credit for, and even less than he is yet to become. I think the world will always need Clay Aiken more than Clay Aiken needs the world. He is a realist; a survivor, and a star no matter how badly someone cuts his hair. I have written, second-guessed and deleted hundreds of posts in other places at other times. Here at FCA, I'm hitting send with a little less trepidation. I'm not aiming to wow anyone; even if I could, (hee) but I am trying to be the authentic zena, who is so not a warrior princess (except maybe for Clay.) I wouldn't have too much troublesaying, "yes, my liege" to him. I have totally stopped trying to figure out why this is the case. It's been four years; I've just accepted it. So, in my usual slooooooooow way of beating around the bush, I want to say thank-you FCA for making this the kind of place where I feel there is room to breathe, to speak, and to get to know people with all kinds of different opinions; where there is respect and tolerance,(even for tremendously run-on sentences) and thank God, lots of laughter and real stuff to keep our Clay heads from floating off into the cybersphere. zena bows......." Thank you, FCA, with all my heart" I(along with my trusty sword) pledge to guard the body to the death, or the next milestone; whichever comes first. eta: Please note that in an effort to reflect the solemnity of this post, zena has refrained from the use of any frivolous emoticons. She hopes readers appreciate the degree of restraint required.

Ah my sentiments exactly...... Playbiller please forgive me for shamelessly snipping your posts to my own devices. Just couldn't help myself. I am painfully familiar with the foibles and antics of repairmen.My kitchen carpenter's idea of a finished product was the pantry cupboard doors sticking so far out when they were open than there wasn't even room to walk around them. They ended up building the hinges into the garage. Gah! But look on the bright side, at least your repairman was in the right house . And then there is this thing with the post count. :bye2: doggie!!!!

I am likewise bonding with my clack every 15 minutes. Fifteen minutes work, fifteen minutes clackin' Um yeah...again, and again. I thought I was a member of clayaikenpix.com but it keeps spitting back my password. I sent them a red alert email detailing how badly I need proof close-ups of chest hair Clay's finer points attributes . Not to worry, 'Toots', :thbighug-1: I'm just working at getting intelligenter all the time; just look at how often I have strike out words before I get the right one. And someone told me body guards hafta be smarter than dog walkers. And I'm, just, about, there.....

Uhhh, just forget any references I may have made to being intelligent, okay?.... Il Divo who??????????? Just kidding.............. But it's all good, some good soul turned my high speed back on, and I'll be watching primo Clack in exactly 1 minute and 29,28......secs..........

:bday: to cindilu2 Whoa baby, the smut meter is running pretty high here today....almost like the good old days back on the purple pages at LBFCA. And here I thought you were all highly intellectual.... Of course I am. :13: Candy what???? I think I'd like to try some of those folds for Clay so we don't get unnecessarily excited confused. Our satellite hookup went out last night in the middle of the cellstream, and of course it is the weekend, so I am condemned to dialup for the near future. I should be able to see/hear Clay sing Solitaire in about six hours and 23 minutes. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr..... Talk about delayed gratification. I am loving those pictures though.... thanks to all who were responsible for my systemic :em0900: delight at seeing them. I watched them download millimeter by millimeter; really, one can learn to appreciate each tiny shadow, bang, eyelash, cheekbone, and so on so much more... It was just a good thing I had something to do because I couldn't fall asleep without thinking of that moronic repairman who wandered into my house and my bedroom yesterday morning. He had the wrong house, and I sure hope he had nightmares of a large half dressed hysterical woman with wild hair chasing him with her bedroom lamp. And No, KarenEh, he wasn't one bit cute. :glare: There is a fine line between fantasy and nightmare. Yawn. I was a tiny bit glad when the cellstream did go down though because a discussion about whether the applause and the ovation was really just Claymates not most of the audience was just beginning to get to the nitpicky point. Interesting fact: Did you know the appropriate male term is "divo" and that "diva" is female? My opera singing son just taught me that.

If Scarlett got clack, that's all I need to know before heading to bed. It has been one awful day. It started out with a strange man walking into my bedroom this morning with a toolbox. I have never been so freaked out in my life. But as you can see I seem to have survived. Now all I have to do is figure out what to do with my best very blackened burnt rice pot.... and oh yeah I seem to have melted the cord for the coffee-maker by putting the pot onto it. Oy vey!!! ......there was a man............ Gimme a sec, Claygasm, I'll rescue you! Ooops, Muski beat me to it.

I knew it!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ON. YOUR. KNEES. FOR. THE. SOLITAIRE. MAN. NEW YORK !!!!!!!!!! But, but, but, sob....I missed it..... I fell asleep on the couch for a tiny minute hour, threw something in the oven for supper, put some rice on to boil, and dashed for the computer, and couldn't get the cellstream connection to work. Ten minutes later, after I read "HOly shit. Crowd ROARS!!! Glory note....perfection!!!!! Ending perfection!!!! Crowd ROARS!!! The crowd is going absolutely fucking nuts...." The *&%#X smoke detector goes off in the kitchen. Please please please let there be Clack. eta to add quote marks cause nobody else is talking about smoke in my kitchen.

I have this tendency of trying not to post after several people before me have already spoken my very thoughts so well that I just don't feel the need to be redundant. (Ha, maybe this is why my post count remains so low!) But here, at FCA, I am getting just a teensy tiny bit braver. ......one small step for zena..... I cannot, not respond to your post, Permaswooned. You have been so blessed to have been able to experience, in person, some of those "starshine" moments Clay has . And I, among many, as you can see, am very grateful that you share them so eloquently and generously with your words and those pictures of light and shadow and angles of the essence of Clay. Just WOW and thankyou. And the strangest thing is that for me, thousands of miles away, literally and figuratively, from those kind of live magical moments, I have always known, even through the blurry mirror of television and clack and my sometime rose coloured glasses, that he is "every inch a star". I can't get nervous for him. He has proven himself again and again. I believe he considers himself his strongest critic, and has long past learned his present and his future belongs only to him. It will be Neil Sedaka's night but Clay cannot help but shine. :F_05BL17blowkiss:

{{{{{Idyjocelyn and family}}}}} Safe travels!!! I'm about twenty miles north of the Minnesota border, so the warm vibes will be just that much closer. {{{{{KAndre}}}}}} because I so feel the pain you insist you don't have. keepingfaith, it would be great to have your wonderful laugh out loud story among the dozens of cheesy gooey ones, (like maybe the one I might send in just cause I'm totally enamored with the thought of Clay reading it). I'm sure he needs a good laugh between all those groaners. :RandomSmiley:

:00000441: Hey, thanks for "dancin' Clay" , Gibby!!!!! That boy was born to moooove!!!! Have to share a funny story about how my fangirly comments caught up to me today. About a month ago, I bought some of my favorite skin care products from a cosmetics counter; not cause I really needed them, but because they were all done up in a pretty pink bag with a special promo for proceeds going to Unicef. I really should learn to stifle my philanthropy :31: hee hee, and put more cash away into my dwindling ticket fund.... Anyway, the perfectly decorated saleswoman noticed me reading the fine print, and came up to me, all primed to extol the virtues of this particular wrinkle warrior. I just laughed and told her I was reading the Unicef bit. She surprised me then, and we got into quite an interesting talk about the third world and Unicef, and do I dare say it, Unicef ambassadors. Now, how could I walk away from a lead-in like that? I mean, could I? Course not!! And she had heard of Clay. A little bit of everything. I recognized something familiar in her eyes. Could it be; I looked again; yep, there it was. :hubbahubba: "But," she remarked a little sadly as she rang up my contribution to Unicef and a lovelier complexion, "from what I hear he wouldn't be interested in the likes of me." I raised my eyebrows, and surrendered my Mastercard, " You have a computer?" She nodded. " Ever watch YouTube?"I asked as I signed. "Check out some of the videos from this summer's concerts, and see what you think." Oh was that me talking?? I must admit I shook my head at myself really hard when I got home and unpacked the day's shopping. Maybe the wrinkle warrior would work so well she wouldn't recognize me if I happened that way again. She musta seen me coming today. "I know you; you're the Unicef lady! How are you enjoying your skin care products?" I fastened my gaze on her shoes; the "skin care products" had not been out of their pretty box, and I had the lovely lines to prove it. She waited, and I looked up at the grin on her face, " I watched those videos; i watched a lot of videos.....and I have my eye on Clay Aiken. Another I'm in love with Clay Aiken. She was gushing... She was almost disappointed to hear he was doing a Broadway stint; seems she didn't think he should waste his talent. I think Clay must of heard her in New York. "I always loved Mick Jagger, :thsigns053: but Clay's even got him beat. " She skeered me a little. I am undecided whether to feed her clack in the hopes of discounts and/or beauty tips, or shall I just give her Couchie's email address? eta: congratulations, Couchie, good for you!!!!!!

The last several days have been a series of days. I have finally succeeded in running away from myself (temporarily at least) and the significant others that have been causing my brain to combust and my :laught31: Today, during a quick stop at my doctor's office to have a prescription refilled.....(why yes I love, ) he went all thorough on me and well, :281: apparently I have high blood pressure. Now, that couldn't be the stress.... could it????? (See siggy for clarification) End Part 1 of self absorption post. I am continuing to pray for all those affected by the fires in South California. Thousands of miles north and east, up here in Winnipeg, Canada, the fires are at the top of all the headlines. Nature can be so wild and unstoppable at its worst; so devastating in its power even as we try, against all odds, to prevail against it in order to protect what we have invested so much in. Strangely, the wind was howling here today too and taking my breath away the moment I stepped out of shelter. On the prairies, once the wind takes hold of fire or snow or whatever is in its path, we have learned to get out of the way. Of course, there is so much more space out here for the wind to wear itself out; not nearly as many people or as much infrastructure to wreak havoc on. In the business we're in, weather is everything. It has wiped us out more times that I care to remember. I've stood and watched it; completely unbelieving what was happening in front of my eyes, and crazily prayed for a miracle. These disasters leave such scars on the decimated land, on the people they affect, and it takes so many little miracles for healing to begin, and to gain the strength to begin again. I believe in miracles. {{{{{Idyjocelyn and family}}}}} Beginning of Part 2:self absorption post.... K'Andre, I am the root canal queen, and I have the crowns to prove it. I am working up the courage to make another appointment for November 6th, when the rest of the Claynation will be in LV living it up. :headbangerf: If I'm going to be miserable, I might as well be totally miserable. Now, I've gone and got myself all depressed with my own post. Duh! I think I need... See y'all later.

to #188 and many more.....umm....ppposts...yeah, many more posts!!! Love those posts.... What sword???? :29:

Hi KarenEh? KarenEh?

cha cha trusty, I'm very glad to hear you are okay physically. Don't forget to take care of your whole self though. Experiences like that can be pretty unnerving. I was very lucky to walk away with no injuries from my totalled car this June after a rather devastating highway collision with a huge buck; complete with a rack of antlers. Sometimes life throws up these unexpected stop signs that just give us time to pause, take stock, and shift one's perspective a bit. Muskifest, I think the opportunity to experience the larger world is one of the best opportunities we can offer our children. IMO, it's worth every penny, and can teach them things we as parents, don't often have the resources to offer them. to ldyjocelyn, luckiest1, and kareneh? "Spam me, baby!" And yet another the English language's formerly proper nouns becomes a potentially smutty descriptive verb at the disposal of the claynation.

Welcome to FCA, ausdon!!!!! I'm pretty new here myself but have a habit of not knowing when to go to bed so I'm usually hanging around here this time of night. I'm from Canada, and have been a fan of Clay's since American Idol days. I think this is a pretty great board, and I really feel comfortable here. The timing of your special trip couldn't be better............sounds like Sir Robin is rolling out the red carpet just for you!!!!

Scarlett, I have enjoyed the wonderful concert clack that was synonymous with the Clayfan fame of your messageboard name long before I was lucky enough to meet you in person. At first, it was a little hard to believe you weren't .....umm.... taller??? Oh, I am so going to get myself into trouble with the eHP here if I don't say this right. What I mean is; there you were, kind of quiet and all, and we were all lined up in the Knoxville bus line, and it was your FIRST time. Things like this so reinforce my unrefutable rationale, (and give credence to the line I feed to all the poor souls who attempt an inquisition when I set off for yet another concert) for wanting to meet the people whose work and words I respect, enjoy and admire; face to face, hug to hug. So 'scuse me, but I seem to have been copying and pasting your words as much lately as I have downloaded your videos. " Just sit still and listen." I think those are pretty wise words for a busline virgin; not only for the Clay Aiken experience, but in all the noise,stress and clamour of this world. thank you, you are very smart and sweet!!! :F_05BL17blowkiss:

It is a very good thing I do not often visit the ofc messageboards.... I have a 25 yr. old son who during the last ten years, in his struggle with panic attacks and social anxiety, has gained well over a hundred pounds to his average 6 foot frame. This has occurred directly as a result of the various levels of professionals experimenting and trying to determine what type of treatment would help him. It is painfully ironic that this undesired weight gain undermines an already poor self-esteem and chases the patient further underground. It seems pretty clear to me that people who make snap judgements like this have no understanding of how devastating and unique each of these mental health illnesses and conditions can be to any given individual. And certainly no grasp at all of what I believe to be, imo, in Clay's case, an authentic display of true courage and pure grit in meeting the challenges his profession places him in. Sorry for the rant, but this just pressed one of my higher level of indignation buttons. On to happier things..... Muskifest....Word, word, word.... and congrats on your NY tickets!!!!! Aikim, coming from another (very nearly 50) mom, you have expressed, (bolding mine) a lovely and most unselfish sentiment here; that is, imo, offered in the same generous spirit of the comments Clay so naturally responded to in kind yesterday. I hope your shining example of what elicits "mistiness" in Clay and also expresses so well how many of us would love to have Clay realize, in even the smallest way, how much joy and delightful craziness he has brought into our lives, will not be soon forgotten. :F_05BL17blowkiss: I couldn't agree more!!! I don't need to be right about anything concerning the future of a Mr. Clay Aiken. I am finding his story more and more fascinating as it unfolds. Bigger.....absolutely. In what direction? Who really knows? The man is full of surprises!!!! And I'm just hangin in there waiting to see what he does next!

me too. "Boundless hope........" thanks for sharing this lovely bit of poetry; Scarlett, it was a perfect fit for my happy hopeful heart tonight. Aikim, and KarenEh? for your "words" to Clay tonight, and the delight we could all share in the two-way communication that occurred as a result. And KarenEh? ......Welcome home!!!!!!!!!! and if you're looking for an April fool, :clay: ................ :pickme: in the meantime I'll be dividin' my time between (love this one, Couchie, ) and

I am way beyond thrilllllled for Mr. Clay Aiken!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111! I am spending tonight in the city with my two grown up sons, and they are suitably impressed. Heeee!!! Of course, my heart is a wee bit sad for meeee; 'cause, in my world, a trip to NY seems as unreachable as a trip to the moon right now. But in the Clay Aiken world, where I have occasionally been blessed to visit, the strangest miracles do occur. Nope, I don't have tickets; but I have a bucket of faith, and absolutely no pride, when it comes to my favorite singin' dancin' actin' guy in tights. This crazy optimism comes from the gurl who went to her very first pop concert in St. Paul Minnesota in 2004. Anyone living in the vicinity of Broadway want to adopt a well behaved Canadian house guest slave in 2008 who has mucho experience in walking dogs????? Well, better get started!!!! When I get back, there better be a "tights" emoticon waiting....

I'm pretty sure Clay coming up north is gonna melt a few snowbanks for you in his wake,Couchie . It really can be lovely and mild up here too (as well as unpredictable and nasty).... our anniversary is on December 29th, and we took all our pictures outside surrounded by beautiful hoarfrost. I stood in a snowbank with open shoes, and wondered why my lovely rose bouquet was completely dead the next morning. The pictures turned out great. :clay: oh, goodie someone else has the same obsession, , sickness, weakness, ??????? I dunno, is there even a name for this state of mind.... Couch Tomato, I am putting in an official request to have my designation changed to "pooch walker" zena sighs....and realizes sadly she will probably be 50 before she ever makes it to fifty posts....... "clayobserver" would make a nice intermediate designation too.....just sayin'

a very heart-felt for all of your kind thoughts and encouraging words for my friend. It never ceases to amaze me that it is even possible, or okay to feel right about sharing personal things like this, now and then, on a messageboard. I mean, I know that's not what it's really for; and that's a good thing, imo. I'm not very consistent myself about letting people I know in RL that I'm thinking about them, and totally lousy about remembering birthday and anniversary stuff. I nearly drove myself nuts for awhile trying to keep up with all the personal concerns that were often posted about at the board where I read most often before I came here. It's hard to make a real connection with so many people I have never actually met even if I can empathize with their concerns. Still, it touches me deeply when someone makes the effort to reach across cyberspace to me. to all of you.... I've been loving the new emoticons.......I'm addicted to the little suckers... My current new favorite!!!!! (zena in her xmas outfit demonstrating hot yoga) Thanks for the Ruben concert pictures; I thought Clay looked pretty comfy in his own skin. liney23, I'm with you here!!!! Yeah I resemble that remark. There was a time when I could honestly say..oh i can eat anything and I won't gain weight. I was called skinny minny until I was about Clay's age and then watch out. heh. And when you are 5 or 10 pounds over weight, you still don't believe it's anything. No it's not until you're 50 pounds over weight that you go hmmm maybe I should put down that 4th peice of bread. Speaking of "resembling that remark" , I can remember thinking being called a "bean pole' throughout most of my first three decades was a bad thing. My new perspective, ( looking up around and over my own poochy parts ) is a kinder and more generous one. YIKES!!!! There is a weight control thread at FCA????? Never mind. I'm ready. Well, maybe not. Hey, Couchie, don't we need some eating emoticons? There's a great pizza snarfing one at CV I'd bring over if I knew how. We could trade it for this one. hmmmmm, I think i need chocolate.....right now. Chocolate and clack; now there's a winning combination.