wandacleo

I would do him for a fee.

While you sluts would do him free!

I would charge him by the inch

So getting rich would be a cinch.

I would do him in a buggy

I would do him soft and huggy

I would do him on the floor

I would do him at the door

In a buggy at the door,

Nice and huggy on the floor

I would do him here or there

I would do him anywhere

(what can I say?...It's the pre-school teachers in me)

Brilliant!

On the tour, on the bus

I would do him without fuss.

I would do him on the lamb

I would do him. Slut, I am.

Jazzgirl I can tell you have been through what the rest of us are tackling and have found some good solutions. I LOVE the bibs. I have both the terry ones and the disposable ones, but I prefer the terry. I used to go crazy washing Mom's clothes because she always had food down the front. This is so much better. When I used to take her out to eat, I just put a kitchen towel in my bag and tucked it the neck of her clothes.

Desertrose I can certainly relate to all you have been through, and I'm so glad that you were able to find a placement that is working out well. Your poor father must have gone through hell. It's just so difficult with Alzheimer's. I go to a support group, and we're all able to laugh at each other's horror stories, and that does hellp--at least we know we're not alone. I think until people live with this problem, they really have no idea what it's like and how unpredictable things can be. It sounds as though you have had way more than your share of heartache in your life.

Sponge baths, by the way, work just fine. It's a rare patient with advanced Alzheimer's who will get into a shower or bath!

Just one little note (since I'm a nurse and can't resist), I hope those of you with a parent with dementia have talked to the doctors about medications. There are a number of different medications for Alzheimers. Sometimes it can be a trial to find the right one, but they can slow the progression of the disease, and in some cases, make improvements. Mom tried Aricept and Exelon, but they both may her very paranoid and delusional. Scary. However, I waited a while and tried Namenda, and it really made a big difference. She improved back to the point she had been about 1 year earlier and has never gotten as bad as she was before we started the medication, and that was 3 years ago. It's so important to have someone who is familiar with Alzheimer's treatment evaluate people with dementia because sometimes doctors just write it off as "old age," but old age doesn't cause dementia--disease does.

Jmh You will be surprised at what you're able to do when the need arises. You do what you need to do. You've already really done a lot to make things better and safer for your mother. It's almost impossible to solve all problems at one time. Sometimes the best you can do is tackle one at a time. And BELIEVE me, it's not at all unusual for one or two siblings to bear the brunt of it while others are in denial. Not seeing is way easier than dealing.

Rant coming, scroll at will...

I hate my job. I hate my superintendent who is making my job a living hell. I hate that I spent all of today on the road looking at an alternative school program that is nothing more than a glorified resource room. I hate that I have to present all the info. and the plans to the school board when I don't even have any kids who either qualify for the program OR are exhibiting behaviors to qualify them. I hate that the superintendent knows JACK SHIT about Special Education and is expecting us to have ALL the plans in place with CHILDREN by Jan. 22. I hate that my superinedent is such a prick that the idea of sitting down and explaining that there are NO children for the program makes me sick to my stomach and my hands sweat. /rant

[whine] I want to hear something from Clay. I listened to his song on the Crooner CD about a 100 times already. Funny, I could have done that without buying it. Oh, and Johnny Mathis sounds like he's hyped up on helium. [/whine]

Happy birthday and anniversary to all celebrating.

Sorry...just had to get that off my chest.

Are you trying to say you're having a bad day????? :F_05BL17blowkiss:

Aikim

CarolinaClay So happy the stork landed safely with it's precious bundle.

Ldyjocelyn

All you who are diabetic....just read an article about a study done by the Univ of Calgary, aerobics classes and weight training are said to lower blood sugar in diabetics.

Good for all of us trying to lose weight and get fit...sometimes it's like an occupation but the results are very rewarding.

I started a weight program 2 weeks ago and the inches are coming off very nicely although the weight loss is just about the same at 15 lbs. I still do cardio and water aerobics but it seems the weights may be the trick to losing the spare tire. Hope so anyway!

ACK!!! You lost 15 pounds and INCHES in two weeks!!!!???

Just kill me now.

Crap I wish! No I've lost 15 lbs over the last several months but just started working on weights and the inches are going away around my midsection.

Sorry, didn't word that very clear...

What kind of weight exercises are you doing that is getting rid of the inches around the middle. I DEFINITELY need those. I have some 2 and 5 pound weights. Are they enough?

Well, we've just about exhausted the food topic and we've looked at Clay's crotch for days.

We'd better get some Clack soon!!!!

Is anyone going to Neil Sedaka tribute with a video camera?

All you who are diabetic....just read an article about a study done by the Univ of Calgary, aerobics classes and weight training are said to lower blood sugar in diabetics.

Good for all of us trying to lose weight and get fit...sometimes it's like an occupation but the results are very rewarding.

I started a weight program 2 weeks ago and the inches are coming off very nicely although the weight loss is just about the same at 15 lbs. I still do cardio and water aerobics but it seems the weights may be the trick to losing the spare tire. Hope so anyway!

ACK!!! You lost 15 pounds and INCHES in two weeks!!!!???

Just kill me now.

Luckiest It is really hard to move people out of their normal environment. Often, they can function pretty well in familiar surroundings but become completely confused in other places. Unfortunately, with dementia, often people have to move because facilities can't always accomodate the needs of the person, especially if they begin to wander and it's not a locked facility. Thank God Mom isn't strong enough to wander away anymore because that was a nightmarish time!!!

If a parent is confused at all and living alone, it's a really good idea to register them with the Wanderer's program--I think it's everywhere (the local police should know). I got the forms from the Alzheimer's Association. I fill out information and send a picture and it's distributed to the local police departments so that if they find someone wandering they can check the files--or you can report the person missing and they have the info they need.

JMH I had a good laugh over the idea of people becoming "more malleable" with increasing dementia. While that may happen with some people, the opposite seems to be a more likely scenario. I've learned to remove the cane and all potential weapons when I'm going to bathe Mom or do any of the things she resists. She beat the crap out of me with her cane one day and damned near choked me another (and she's 98!!!!) It's great that you are getting a care giver. I hired a wonderful woman who comes once a week and extra when I need her--and will even stay for a few days. She's a godsend.

I have learned a few tricks. I cut Mom's hair really short so that I can wash it with a washcloth since she wouldn't put her head under water. She still screams (LOL), but the hair gets clean. I also bought some of those disposable bath thingies (how's that for a technical term) that they use in the hospital. I just stick them in the microwave. I can wipe Mom down really fast and don't have to rinse off soap. If she's really enraged I just step back and let her wave her arms around and air dry. There's no way I can get her into a shower.

Unfortunately, my family live in another state. For a few years, my sisters would come and stay while I went away (when things were better), and they DID come to help last year because I was sick a lot, but I had to hire others to do the care. They won't come and stay if I'm gone anymore. I think they're really afraid and don't know what to do.

Well, I have over an hour to wait for this show to start on the west coast, but it doesn't sound like the high point of the week.

I have to say, I'm starting to find RS's shiteating grin very tiresome on AI.

Is it just me?

I think the round stage is awkward, too.

Hey, I just had a thought! Maybe Britney can come on the Emmy's and apologize for her VMA performance, then Ryan can go on the Oscar's and apologize for his Emmy performance....

Carolina Clay There is nothing so wonderful as a grandchild--all that love and no responsiblity!!

I'm sending positive thoughts your way.

I just had to report back that I walked for 1 mile--20 minutes!! I'm so proud. The last time I saw my endocrinologist, she asked me how much I was exercising and I said about 10 minutes a day and she burst out laughing and said, "Most people would be ashamed and would lie!"

Can you imagine?

Actually, I WAS lying. I was only exercising 5 minutes a day. Tomorrow, 2 miles.

Clayzorback said:

I've always noticed that his dress shoes looked long and narrow. Flat, and sometimes pointed up like a court jester's at the toes. However when he is wearing tennis shoes, his shoes look more normal. I agree with woo lovereyes? He did say he wears his shoes a size larger because he doesn't like his toes scrunched up. I think he should scrunch his toes. *g*

There are no ends to the volunteers willing to scrunch those toes for him.

Good morning (afternoon) all,

Thanks so much for the Waldo show. I've sent it on to every dirty-minded person I know.

Lucky Congratulations!

I weighed myself this morning and by some miracle I've lost 2 pounds in the past week. I have been TRYING to be good, so that is a good beginning.

I'm keeping a food journal and one of my friends and I are sending our journals to each other every evening.

Basically, I'm going to try to eat mostly vegetables and a little meat. No flour and no sugar but I have to have a few potatoes, but I bought the little ones so I'm eating mostly skin. I actually do best on Atkins, but I get so sick of meat and then I go berserk and eat everything in sight and gain the weight back, so I'm trying a different approach. I went to the farmer's market and bought a bunch of vegetables and came home and cooked them all and have them ready in the refrigerator. I usually just eat them cold with oil and vinegar, topped with some sliced meat. So far so good.

I frigging hate to diet, but the doctor says I HAVE to lose weight, and I must show some headway by the time I see her again in November. I was sick most of last year and couldn't exercise and had to take cortisone for a long time after surgery. PLUS, I ate because I was feeling sorry for myself (I must admit.) Pathetic. I gained a MOUNTAIN of weight.

Jmh Honestly, I think your situation is worse than mine--and it sounds very much like your mother has some dementia. Mom would "come and go" when it first started--sometimes making perfect sense and then doing just crazy things. One of the cardinal signs is a change in hygiene--refusing to bathe or wear clean clothes. Have you discussed these things with her doctor and gotten a diagnosis? I can tell you after YEARS of taking care of Mom, I bathe her 2-3 times a week and change her clothes everyday and she yells and screams EVERY SINGLE TIME, but the blessing of a short memory is that she forgets. (God knows what the neighbors think I'm doing to her.) Fortunately, I have a little more control because she lives in my home. It took me about 4 months to get her to keep the diapers on, but I threw out all of her panties and it was either Depends or bare-assed. Sometimes, you just have to do what is right because when people have dementia, they really can't make rational judgements. It sounds as though your mother shouldn't be alone, and that's a very difficult situation. Most facilities here won't take patients with Alzheimer's, and the ones that do run about $7000 a month. Mom has no money, and that's more than I can afford.

Sometimes I feel as though I'm in prison. I'm sure you and others in this situation can relate. I hope you have a good support system. I have WONDERFUL friends who come by to see me because they know I'm stuck at home. I also found a daycare program for Alzheimer's so I can take Mom there for a few hours a day 3 days a week. I tell Mom she's going to school, and she's very happy there.

Families can be a big pain. For the first couple of years, one of my sisters used to say things like, "I guess it's easier to let Mom go crazy than to spend the time helping her with her memory," and "She should have a bath everyday." RIGHT. Then, both of my sisters came to take care of Mom while I was away for 9 days, and that was the last time they ever said a word. The first thing they said when I returned was, "She hasn't had a bath for 9 days. We couldn't do it." Of course, after that, they said they couldn't take care of her anymore. It was too hard for them. Jesus.

OMG, you guys are still talking food and I'm trying to diet.

However, it did remind me of my first trip to Texas. It was hot as....well, Texas...and I kept seeing signs for "frozen custard" and I wondered, "What is THAT?" I envisioned some sort of frozen elegant creme brulee (I know, I know, I forgot where I was) and so I could hardly wait to get some.

Oh, what a shock!!!!

It was just plain old soft ice cream, right out of the machine.

One of the major disappointments of my life.

I hope all who are going to Las Vegas are going to the pre-party. For myself, I went to the Clay Board to the Party Central forum. The Las Vegas thread is there with directions on how to sign up. I wanna meet as many of you as possible... wanna... wanna!

I signed up (assuming it's the same party). I think they have about 250 people coming to the party from different boards, so it should be a lot of fun (although this summer I looked in vain for Texwriter at the huge San Diego party so maybe we will need some way to recognize each other!)

Oh (down evil jealousy!!) I'm wishing I could go to a Christmas concert.

I guess I have no right to complain since I AM going to Las Vegas.

Will I see some of you there?

Well, shit, JumpingJacks, I thought we were friends by osmosis.

You mean we're supposed to actually MEET????

cle (with an accent) means "key" in French. Hmmm.. Unusual name.

I have not responded, although I have continued to read, because I thought Couch Tomato told me not to.

However, since so many of you gave your opinion and I feel I started the whole thing, I do feel I have a right to say something too.

If anyone thought that I was being judgemental about Claygasm herself, I apologize. I thought I was asking a clarification of rules. And I thought I asked it very politely. If that was not the perception by some of you, again I apologize.

On the one hand, I found it impressive that the "old time posters" seemed to "circle the wagons" around their friend whom they understood from past experience. However, as a newbie and an outsider, it was a tad uncomfortable being on the outside of that circle. To be clear, I didn't feel trashed, just on the outside. I wonder if any of you can see that perspective?

I really see how this huge quick growth could be problematic for this board. I personally thought the discussion that followed my question was quite adult and respectful. Lots of different opinions were given. Although I don't agree with your response, Couch Tomato, I will respect it. I won't question again.

Only 11 posts and I already "stirred the turd".

I tried to think through this post very carefully. I think I did alright. Hope it is taken as intended.

As a fellow newbie, I have to say that I felt similarly. As a matter of fact, last night I thought maybe I'd made a giant mistake and that FCA was really no different, and I DID get the impression that we should just not address CGs remarks because she was part of the "in" group.

Well, I've ruminated (don't you just love this word) about this considerably, and this is what I think. I, and some others, are sort of wandering refugees from a board with a resident basher who has free rein to bash away and we are allowed to say nothing because she's "really loves Clay," despite the fact that Clay looked less than impressed with her love in Orlando. And, she's back in full form. So, for a little while, I felt like the resident basher just had a different name here, but the same rules applied. That was really disheartening to me because I thought that calling Clay a jerk about his SISTER was really mean-spirited (especially since HE told us about not returning the call and how much he suffered because of it--and who in the world hasn't neglected to return a call to a sibling???) It seemed like hitting below the belt. I was afraid to even mention that last night because the message seemed to clearly be to shut up.

And, that was probably the best thing. I mean, CG had already posted and said she was leaving the board.

I'm still trying to understand the board and find my way--as are others--and I don't know a lot of you so I have no history (well, except with many of the newbies). Last night, I didn't say much, but I'm sorry I said anything. I am glad, though, that lovethatguy asked the question because maybe it will help to clarify the newbies relationship to the board.