annabear

I'll be off-base with you, bottle. I'm certain there were monetary offers bandied about. Doesn't mean Clay had any intention of entertaining said offers just because they were out there, as Jaymes made crystal clear.

And, luckiest, in case you didn't see it in the speeding train that was the OFC thread the other day -

It would be great if those who have worked things out already could speak to items like this and provide guidance and support to those who need it. If a good friend of yours PM'ed or called about these, what advice would you give her?

I've been going through this with a friend this week. I don't think I've really given her any advice, just been a sounding board for her. And at times, her for me.

When she would say that she saw something that was said or done in this way, I might tell her I saw it that way. It was not saying, "You're wrong," but giving another point of view to think about. I believe that helped.

More of the struggle seems to be with wanting to feel a certain way, or not wanting to feel a certain way, and being upset with oneself for feeling that way. It's just going to take time.

Jaymes is back posting again at the OFC and has just clarified that no money - at all - was involved in any of this.

Post # 7429.

I don't drop in here that often, but the times that I do I always get the feeling of this being such a kind and caring board. I'm glad to see that that hasn't change.

Love you guys. So glad I found this board.

Hmmm... people actually reading and posting here and coming to these conclusions on their own... what about our reputation as the mean board? :27:

Um, Al Davis, couchie? WTH? ETA: I now see your ETA - BWAHAHA!!

There is way to much polygamy goin' on here. We should just form our own commune and live happily ever after.

Since Clay's talk with the mods everything has certainly calmed down over there...or is it that "they" are not awake yet?

There are some pretty insightful posts and a lot more respect being show. No it's not all wine & roses but it is a lot better.

I think it's combination. If people just stop bitching back & forth, just to be bitching back & forth, then they can actually talk things out. What a concept, huh?

I also think that I do forgive him because I don't believe I've thrown 5 years away at all -- he was still wildly entertaining to me at all those shows I attended, during the TV appearances, during Spamalot. He's given my life a rich new component, one of entertainment and joy. He's also given me the ability to learn so much about this world through him, the people around him, and the fans on message boards. Yes, that learning involves some ugly as well as good, but it's all learning.

Absolutely. He's still a teacher.

And whatever 'lie' there was simply does not trump everything else he's done for the last five years. For those who can't get past it - does it really, truly negate all that good? Is five years of showing us a good man, and a great entertainer - of enriching our lives, really erased by this one thing? Who could live up to those standards? Not me.

That has been my mantra this week.

Now I want to marry cindilu2. Who knew I was a polygamist as well as a liar?

Join the club!

Hee! Sounds like we need to drag out that anarcho-syndicalist commune of cyclically in sync omnivores for Clay Aiken thread title again...

It's ok if you maintain your position CG. One less person to kill at the alter.

Oh please! If we're going to go with same sex marriage anyway, why not bigamy?

I think I love Jaymes even more today!

Picked up my copy of People on the way home tonight. I think I love Clay even more today, too.

Off to work so I can see Sir Robin and some FCA'ers in January....

I almost never go to OFC because of a few really obnoxious bitches--some of whom I believe are really trolls as they NEVER do anything but cause trouble. However, I decided yesterday that I was going to donate some hours of my time to posting at OFC to try to keep the attention off of those raving bitches. The tone at OFC today has been quite light and often very humorous. I think that's a good thing. I know the bitches will be back, but good people could bury them by posting.

I hope some others will join me.

I totally understand if you don't.

This is my reasoning for hanging out over there too. I think I said to couchie one time - I'm much better with virtual housekeeping than real!

And speaking of couchie, I absolutely agree with you about the OFC message board being way too late to the game. The cliques had already formed their separate corners of the universe and playing well together is obviously not this fandom's strong point. As for your friend's reaction about him coming out the stage door - bwah!

In my opinion, Jaymes posted as a woman - and one who has stood by for years and watched a portion of his loving fandom tear him up in just about every aspect of his life. She couldn't have said more plainly that she was not speaking for Clay, but for herself (and once, for her son). Did she use too broad a brush for one aspect of her vent? Perhaps. But I don't fault her for it - she, like the rest of them, was posting from her heart. If that offends/affronts some people - well that's too bad. She also stuck around and took the backlash - just like any of us would have to. And when one person apologized to her for her remarks about Parker, she not only accepted it graciously, she stopped other people from continuing to beat up on the offender. Classy woman.

I am very, very glad that Clay has her in his life.

I couldn't have said it any better.

Clay just posted at the OFC: Post # 5715

I love this board. :F_05BL17blowkiss:

Damn. Why has sleep only been really good this week when it's time to get up in the morning?

Well, I am a bit surprised. I just caught up to Jaymes' long post and I am really surprised, but I do believe i found my burnt puppy. I didn't expect it, I thought it would be something impossible like Clay asking us to support PH with his arms around him, but I do believe it was Jaymes indicating that anyone who has any problem with this article is a homophobe or feel incredibly entitled. I realize that anyone not having issues would not read it that way, but it seemed pretty damn clear to me, but why not join in on the bashing on people who had any doubts. Let's not give us time to get used to a 90 degree change in "official boards" direction, nope, lets just outright insult anyone who has any problem.

Play, hold on - Jaymes did not say anyone or everyone. She practically used more disclaimers and qualifiers in that one post than we've used on this board since the baby news broke.

{{{{Scarlett}}}} :F_05BL17blowkiss:

Good luck with your driver's test tomorrow, ansa! :00000442:

Speaking of asparagus and alternative plant lifestyles, when the word asexual came up in that thread, I was sorely tempted to post that self-pollination won't make you go blind.

What.

I wish you had!

Scarlett, check your email. *g*

MUAH to annabear!

Hee - she already checked her pm's.

Holy sweet mother of god!! I just got home and read all the clayandr posts (thank you x a bjillion to my lucky friend) and holy mother of god. The heck with Clay. *I* want to have Jaymes' baby! I saw names that made be grin - couchie and wanda and a few others (I am still sitting here gobsmacked so I can't recall who else. OMFG. You ladies ROCK, as does Jaymes. FLOVE!!!!!!!!!!

Hee - and now I see that I'm gonna be in for sloppy seconds (eighths? twelfths??) to get me some Jaymes. Wheeeeeee!!

You know - I don't mean to be flippant - but this might just be the best day I've ever had in this fandom.

P.S... that is not a lie, either. :-)

I guess I'm Invisible...

Here's the link to Jaymes' first post today: #2986 in the People Magazine Interview thread in the Man forum. And her MOST AWESOME MUST READ long post: #3781

I know the OFC isn't private and it will probably get out what she wrote but I kinda feel that it's like Clay coming out to his mother..might as well do it today if you're going to do it at all. I do think it is only a tiny fragment and she's sympathetic towards the people that just need time. But to insinuate, for instance, that Team Clay are using Parker in some nefarious way and not expect to get a retort just goes to show how common and used to just saying whatever we want to and about Clay has been tolerated. Enought is enough.

OMG, yes, enough is enough is ENOUGH. That b.s. made me see red.

I can see now why Clay loves Jaymes so much and why he loves her...they really are soulmates and they make beautiful babies...hope they have more!

I agree. I so totally agree.

I love Jaymes!!! I've been following that thread at the OFC all afternoon! I think she needs to join our board here - she's quoted & agreed with several of our members - Couchie, JennaZ, wanda!

I've been saving all of her posts to a Word doc - I haven't been this productive at work in I don't know how long!

ETA: I love Jaymes even more... her latest post...

For those who are struggling and have posted here:

Chicks, I'm am not the world's most empathetic person (all those now wheezing in laughter can stop now), but the way you have expressed yourselves makes me feel you. You are such a big part of what makes the FCA the perfectly lovely and real place it is...

And in reading Jaymes' article - oh yeah, Jaymes is the biggest Clay fangirl of all! "Perfect person"? Heeeeee! So far the only other response I've gotten is that they are struggling to believe in Clay's gayness simply because of his lack of taste if someone else isn't dressing him (and some of the things he's worn just because someone told him too).

WORD to the first part and BWAH to the second!

Surviving the money crisis? I heard Colbert say that we should diversify: Bury your money in the backyard AND stuff some in the mattress.

BWAH!

Just saw Clay on GMA. The part that caught me was when he mentioned how stubborn he is and that he's always believed he can handle anything. And I think he probably can! But WTF is up with E? I saw a promo yesterday with Ryan and his cohort on their gossip show and they said they will have an interview with Clay Aiken's former lover today. Again, WTF is that? That swamp thing?

Yeah, that was a WTF moment for me as well. Would it kill some people to keep their damn mouths shut for 15 minutes rather than trying to cash in?

I love Jaymes.

So how much Parker footage did I miss? I came in when Clay was talking about his mother and his grandmother. Can't wait to watch the clack when I get home!

Not a whole lot of Parker footage. I think we'll see more of the CUTE little man tomorrow morning.

I saw it. He's still the same Clay. Same smile, same giggle, same heart...

Oh yeah - same sitting on foot!

Tomorrow he's going to talk about Jaymes and their decision to have Parker.

Speaking of, People.com now has an interview with Jaymes posted:

Jaymes Foster: Clay's a 'Natural' Dad

By David Caplan

Originally posted Thursday September 25, 2008 07:00 AM EDT

Clay's best friend – and the mother of their 7-week-old son Parker – music producer Jaymes Foster, 50, chatted with PEOPLE during the magazine's photo shoot at Aiken's home in North Carolina, where Foster is currently staying. While Aiken tended to Parker, who was conceived via in vitro fertilization, Foster dished about her pregnancy, being an older mom, and who's better at changing diapers:

What is it about Clay that makes him a great dad?

Jaymes: He's an incredible caregiver. As far as changing the diapers and seeing what's wrong with [Parker] and getting him to go sleep, Clay's a natural and he's really, really good with that. On a larger scale, he's the perfect person. He's been a school teacher, we have the same morals, family is very important to him and Parker means everything to us.

At age 50, do you feel ready to take on parenting for the first time?

Jaymes: I really think I was not ready to have children – well, I know I was not ready to have children, be a mother – in my 20s or 30s. I had the freedom then to travel the world and have a wonderful career. I believe at this point in my life it's the right time, and I think because it's the right time, I'll hopefully do a good job. If I don't, Clay will be all over me!

Was the pregnancy difficult?

Jaymes: I thought I'd be one of the lucky ones that didn't get the nausea, that I'd sail right through the pregnancy. But unfortunately I had it the whole time! I dealt with it on my own until I found out that there is a great new medication that helps eliminate the nausea, which I took the entire pregnancy. But other than that, it was really a breeze.

Do you support Clay's decision to publicly acknowledge he's gay?

Jaymes: I totally support him. It's his choice. It's a choice that he made. I love him and I'll support him in any choice that he makes, whether as an entertainer, or a father, human being, of course I support him.

Are there any baby-related chores that you or Clay shy away from?

Jaymes: It's funny because we were both very relaxed from the minute he was born. But the one thing I'm a little nervous about is clipping his hand nails because I think I might cut him, so Clay definitely has a handle on that and takes care of that. [Parker] doesn't like baths so much, so I tend to do the bathing because he kind of cries through that so I've taken that on as a job. Clay would be happy to do that, but I just figure, okay, if he does the nails, I'll do the bath.

How has your relationship with Clay changed since Parker's birth?

Jaymes: We love each other dearly and deeply as friends, but I think as parents now, there's an even greater bond, certainly for me. Our job is to remain best friends for the rest of our lives and that's the most important thing for Parker.

For the photos of Parker and more of Clay Aiken's candid interview about fatherhood, coming out, and his message for the Claymates, pick up the upcoming issue of PEOPLE, on newsstands Friday