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The 2007 Clay Blogs - Ain't Deconstructin' - RADNER

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"I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next."

– Gilda Radner

Have at it!!

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I'll look at this quote a couple of ways.

As it relates to Clay... I don't know if he relates it to himself -- I do know that this is how I see him dealing with 2006. The quote sums up what I've been trying to say since the album came out. That no matter how ATDW came to be, he still took up the challenge, put his all into it, grew musically, and then went out there like the class act he is to sell it. He made the best of things.

In addition, I think he is saying to US -- all your extrapolation is just whack. Ha.

And then finally, I don't how much I can apply this to my own life. I'm a survivor..I keep striving. It's weird but I live by my instincts. I've been fooled once or twice. I'll agonize over something for a couple of weeks but when I make my decision..BAM..people don't know what hit 'em. Hee. I can deal with surprises but really like a structured life. I find structure goes out the window when you have to take care of someone else. I honestly give props to all parents out there...it's like the definition of chaos. Some things can overwhelm you - how do you handle those things with grace. I had to learn how to do that this year. I didn't always do it successfully. But I'll continue to try.

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"I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next."

– Gilda Radner

This quote says a lot to me, and I think being in the Clay Aiken fandom has helped me to understand it, and apply it to my life.

I've always been a bit of a control freak, at least in some aspects of my life. Wanting to know exactly what was going to happen, planning for any and all options that COULD happen, things like that. I will say that this is not about ALL aspects of my life, thank God. But for the longest time, it was that way with my Clay fandom. I wanted to know everything that was going to happen with Clay's life and career. Wanting -- nay, needing -- to know that was all consuming to me, probably to the point of neglecting other things in my life.

But then, last February hit. Remember? That's when the EW article came out with the album of covers news, followed immediately by Clay's blog with the hint of love songs. The emotions in the fans that came out in those few days were astounding to me. I just today was going through my PM box at my old haunt, and hit this time frame in the messages. One friend in particular was freaked by the thought of what was going to happen for Clay. She didn't want that for Clay at all. And it kind of hit me -- that there was nothing I could do about it, and there was no reason for me to be upset over something I could not control. What I wanted for Clay was inconsequential.

It was at that point that I knew I needed to step back away from at least a portion of my fandom. I needed to just let go of the baggage, and just enjoy what was going to happen with Clay Aiken, whether it was what I wanted for him or not. And I've been trying to do that -- and mostly succeeding. I'm still not successful at staying away from message boards, I've just substituted the FCA for my old place. *g* But I've learned to enjoy what Clay gave me this past year.

This really has translated into my life as well, especially my work life. In the past three years, I've had some curve balls thrown at me (losing a job that I loved, finding a job with a two hour commute every day), to finally settle at a place that is good. I get to do some things that I simply love doing. At the same time, though, there's some stuff here that I have to just let go as well. I've learned to pick my battles, and come up with responses that are similar to stuff I would write on a CA message board.

So...with that tome...I'd just say, learn to let things roll, plan but not too carefully, and realize that sometimes not knowing is the best thing in the world.

[/soap box]

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To me, the quote suggests that Clay is much more philosophical about his life than many of his fans.

He used to say that he liked structure, hated surprises. However, I think his experiences have shown him that things do not always progress according to plan. All you can do is make the best of it as it happens.

Despite the fact that he described his mood as "Happy," some seem to see this as a statement of discontent or resignation. However, I think it's one of acceptance, which can be quite liberating, actually. If you accept that things happen that are beyond your control, you can't blame yourself if you tried your best.

And none of us know what will happen next. Life is full of serendipitous twists and unexpected opportunities. It's not enough to just plan. We have to be open to changes around us, be able to adapt to new situations, and give ourselves permission to proceed knowing that we can't know everything.

In terms of my fandom, it tells me that I shouldn't be so tied to my expectations that I am unable to enjoy what I have before me. I'll admit, I experienced moments of disappointment and worry when I read about the love songs cover concept. However, I couldn't let my notions of what he should do ruin the pleasure I get from actually hearing him sing.

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Do I have to type anything...JennaZ got hold of the smarter half of my brain...

excellent post everybody...

what it tells me about Clay?

actually, nothing new. If people truly pay attention to what he has said in the past...he has said that although he had all these plans in the past...he realized that God may have a different path for him. I also see that he has had a lot of disappointments and triumphs and changes and he has relized that the healthiest way to deal with it is to realize that...

shit happens...deal with it..

plans change...make the most of it...

I really think this is an important lesson fans should learn and a philosophy to adapt cos there is so much uncertainty in the entertainment business that if they will be following someones career this closely...they will need it to deal with disappointments and changes.

on a personal point of view...this is something that I have adapted in my life very early on. I had such a different plan in my life and my goals were so far from what I am today. So I learned to accept that life is uncertain and to make the most of what I have and be open to anything that comes. I remember that once my mom told me she was so sad that I didn't get my doctorate and that I was living here so far away...I told her that she should let that go cos to regret that is to regret that I have my beautiful family. I would rather have my three girls than a huge career any day.

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Do I have to type anything...JennaZ got hold of the smarter half of my brain...

excellent post everybody...

what it tells me about Clay?

actually, nothing new. If people truly pay attention to what he has said in the past...he has said that although he had all these plans in the past...he realized that God may have a different path for him. I also see that he has had a lot of disappointments and triumphs and changes and he has relized that the healthiest way to deal with it is to realize that...

shit happens...deal with it..

plans change...make the most of it...

I really think this is an important lesson fans should learn and a philosophy to adapt cos there is so much uncertainty in the entertainment business that if they will be following someones career this closely...they will need it to deal with disappointments and changes.

on a personal point of view...this is something that I have adapted in my life very early on. I had such a different plan in my life and my goals were so far from what I am today. So I learned to accept that life is uncertain and to make the most of what I have and be open to anything that comes. I remember that once my mom told me she was so sad that I didn't get my doctorate and that I was living here so far away...I told her that she should let that go cos to regret that is to regret that I have my beautiful family. I would rather have my three girls than a huge career any day.

what does it mean what is clay trying to say

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what does it mean what is clay trying to say

That's kind of the point of this thread -- what do YOU think he meant? How does his quotes work for YOUR life? Don't be afraid to tell us....

I would say that one thing I believe Clay probably learned AFTER writing this blog, and reading responses...is that he will never get through to some people. *g*

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