I've been going through this with a friend this week. I don't think I've really given her any advice, just been a sounding board for her. And at times, her for me.
When she would say that she saw something that was said or done in this way, I might tell her I saw it that way. It was not saying, "You're wrong," but giving another point of view to think about. I believe that helped.
More of the struggle seems to be with wanting to feel a certain way, or not wanting to feel a certain way, and being upset with oneself for feeling that way. It's just going to take time.