Clays impossible not to like # 64: A super smart, caring, determined, classy, easy-going, and genuinely good, likeable guy

[jmh123]

Ouch! ldyj! Ouch! couchie! I feel for both of you. I've experienced both things (well it was my finger in the car door--not good); these are not small pains. Baby yourselves a bit and take extra care until you are healed.

Strange week for me. For the last year I have had a freelance job helping a guy revise a book. Well, that's what it was supposed to be--to revise a book and make an ebook of it. I haven't written much detail about this because the guy drove me bat shit crazy often, and I didn't think it was appropriate to rag about him in public, him being a client and all. I sure complained about him often to friends though. There was affection there for sure; I called him "the Old Guy." But he could make me so angry, and sometimes it went the other way as well.

When we started this project he was 91 years old, turned 92 half-way through, and I thought he was a vibrant, energetic guy. In 2010 he had put on a huge celebration in San Francisco for the anniversary of the United Nations with a symphony concert and a multi-day symposium. I met him in early 2012 when I attended the first day of a short course he was teaching for the OLLI program--with a hundred people attending and three or four assistants, a pianist, a DVD, and the whole shebang. And he drove himself there! He was involved in an orchestra program with some local Durham kids, and they were about to have a performance. Never occurred to me that he wasn't totally compentent.

Well the job turned out to be quite odd, for a number of reasons. One was that I never could seem to get the guy to do anything on his end, like respond to stuff I sent him. Turned out he couldn't exchange documents by computer, follow "track changes," and so forth. OK, he couldn't keep up with technology, he's old, no blame there. But he wouldn't tell me this. He would lose an email or a document and just not ever respond. Then he would call me a month later and ask how the book was coming. Eventually he fessed up and I had a copy printed for him at Office Depot (the first of many), but he lost that and was embarrassed to tell me for two months. Didn't stop him from demanding that I keep working!

At that point we switched to an hourly rate (although I only charged him for about half the hours I worked, and I gave him a discount rate to begin with of about 25% of what I should have charged). Because he clearly didn't want his book revised--he wanted to write a new one. He knew exactly what he wanted to say, but he wanted me to write it for him. This was awkward, as you can imagine. He had quite an unusual history and set of experiences, and a vision that arose from them, and it was over my head.

And over his head by then, although it took me a long time to realize that. He was becoming more and more negative, kept harping about the world coming to an end, but I had signed up to help him revise a book with a lovely, positive vision.

Eventually I figured out a way to work with him by asking him questions that were very specific. By phone or in person he would talk and I would type as he spoke, and when I would organize my notes, there would be a page or two of perfect paragraphs! It was pretty amazing that his mind could carry these beautifully formed thoughts of such depth and clarity. I kept them in folders by topic and made chapters of them. Even then we went over and over the pages and revised and revised. He would make me come to his house and sit while he read the mss. and told me what he wanted changed. He would zero in on a few lines I had written myself to make a transition in the transcribed material, and change them, even though he could not remember which were his words and which were mine. All of his editorial comments were excellent, mind you, when I could get them. He edited the first 25 pages of his book (not always the same 25 pages because of revisions) over and over and over, and they were always improved. But he always wanted changes, wanted to add things.

And he wanted not a typo or an error anywhere, which is fine with me except I wasn't getting a lot of cooperation with him on that. I kept telling him if you can't do it we need someone else to go over this. I'm too involved in the mss to be a good proofreader anymore. I figure if you can do 25 pages, you can do the rest, right?

Finally I was able to put all of this together and make an ebook. I took a few harping chapters he wrote in June, the dictation, a few chapters from the old book, bits of an article he wrote in the early 1970s that he finally gave me a few months ago, quotes from newspaper articles about him I found online, one final chapter that we wrote together, and made a book of it. A pretty good one I think.

AFTER I had made the ebook he finally got a neighbor with proofreading experience to go over the printed version I had Office Depot make of the pdf, so then I had to make 50 some changes within the ebook maker, which was an enormous pain in the ass.

Perhaps the most annoying oddity of all was his sense of urgency, which grew more and more intense, that we had to finish the book NOW. Even AFTER I made the ebook. You can probably guess where this is going, but I didn't. This went on for a solid year, remember, and I only gradually realized his mental impairments, which he was terrific at hiding. He had a (younger--in her 70s) wife of many years who didn't seem particularly concerned or to notice that anything was different. He could discuss the daily New York Times in detail, was always reading complex books (that he understood) and serious magazines. He drove himself to the doctor and the store, and (according to him) frequently enchanted people at social gatherings with his conversation about the book he was writing. Which I found pretty funny since all he seemed able to do was to hound me to hurry up and write his book. He was demanding, charming, sometimes insincere, brilliant, and frustratingly incompetent.

In late December we got the book published in a printed version at last, with yet more of the kind of obstacles that only he could produce. He had finally realized that he wanted a professional looking printed book, not an ebook, just before I left for NY in early December to see Clay. While I was in NY he enlisted the help of a new friend who had published books of poetry on Lulu, a self-publishing company. The friend was very helpful, but for various reasons based on my author's confusion about the process, I ended up having to do dozens of hours of extra work in mid-December when I had absolutely no time, was sick from something I ate at the airport, and was finishing the yearly directory for my community. I went from that to a cold to the flu, and still haven't recovered. He would send these urgent emails telling both of us to hurry up, and the next day there'd be an email, add this photo please.

So after months and months of driving me completely nuts, but providing income and a stimulating if frustrating work process, the book finally finished and in print, the Old Guy up and died. He fell in the bathroom, injured himself (just bumps and bruises, but very painful) and a couple of weeks later, last Sunday, he died. I was completely stunned.

Wow--didn't mean to write a tome there, but I think I'll post it anyway.

[FearofH2O]

So where does that leave you jmh? Are you the heir to the book or is it just a mess? I can't imagine all the stress you endured.

[jmh123]

Fear, I have no rights whatsoever. I don't even have access to Lulu. The whole thing came to an abrupt halt, but then it had kind of come to a halt in that he had a book he could see and touch that was "real" to him.

If his wife asks me, I could be involved, but I have no idea how she feels about the book. She showed only minimal interest in the book, and in fairness to her, she was constantly having to go do things for her mother who is even older and sicker than the Old Guy was, so what I interpreted as disinterest might have been that she was grateful for something that kept him so occupied. I just learned that about her mother a month or so ago, and also that she helped him write the first book and said "never again"! LOL. The one and only conversation of any duration that I had with her.

In her email she said he died at home in her arms as he would have wanted. That I agree with, and that was a gift. He had certainly lived long and well!

I must've posted a bunch of times here last year, "I finished a project, or I'm almost finished a project," and then somehow it wasn't finished, and now it's a strange feeling. But as I said many times, it was a paying job, and that is no small thing for me, plus I was doing something really interesting and I could do it at home.

As for the stress I have to kind of laugh now, as if you rewrite the whole experience as helping a man get something done that he desperately wanted to get done before he died, then I guess I did a really good thing. And it really wasn't that bad. I find myself missing him, even.

Or I can look back and smack myself side of the head at how many times I yelled at the poor guy who really was going to die really soon and really was, as I suspected, "losing it."

I think I kind of knew for the last few weeks that he would die soon. He had pleurisy and he also had had prostate cancer for decades that had begun to really bother him. He never treated it and it had long remained dormant. When I first met him, his self-image was of a guy who laughed at doctors who diagnosed him as near death because it had been happening to him since he was a teenager. But I think I knew, and he knew. I think he is somewhere saying, "I told you so!"

His book is about all the revolutions he had experienced, cultural revolutions of various sorts. Being black-balled by McCarthy committee, civil rights (arrested in 1962 for going into a restaurant in Baltimore with an African-American student), lived for a time in Israel but sympathized vocally with Palestine, supported the rock revolution musically (he had a group that opened for the Dead a few times, recorded with Keith Emerson), and so on and on and on.

[jmh123]

And most importantly, I keep forgetting to say, the Old Guy's first career was as a French horn player. I nearly peed myself when Clay started with that schtick in connection with this last tour. Wish those two could have met.

[Couch Tomato]

So I went in seach of the wallingford Good News but couldn't find it in audio. My favorite version is from El Cajon but I couldn't find just the full audio of just it. So then I started just looking for other concerts from 2004 JNT and finally hit one that sounds good and is a good recording. Canfly's version from Detroit. Shortyjill...do you have your Wallingford version just in audio or is it on video.

Luckiest - watched the videos (finally). Both Sides Now is beautiful. But yes Clay we really won't watch you when you're singing. LOL

LadyJ's top 13:

• "What Are You Doing New Year's Eve?" -- the first time I heard this song, I was driving to work. I almost drove off the road! I immediately said to myself "he was born to sing this song." Such a romantic song, and he sings it so well! I also have to recommend it because it was during the banter before this song that he talked to me and my husband during the 2012 Christmas tour!
  

I love this song LdyJ.

• "Here You Come Again" -- when he hits those low notes during the song, it makes me shiver. I really wish more people could hear this song, and I was really hoping that this would have been released as a single from ATDW. It's such a radical departure from the original version, and I think it would have gotten some major attention.
  

One of my favorites from the album but didn't make my top 13. I think with this song and a few others on this album, I didn't know the original so Clay's was my only version.

Jesus is Love" -- the AMA night was magical. When Clay hit that long note, with the camera swirling around him, I fell off my couch. Amazing.

wow, blast from the past.

Only 2 duets made my list. And honestly I have a bunch of songs that I absolutely adore from the whole gang of Clay, Quiana and Angela and Jacob. I thought they were absolutely marvelous together. I know he was a pain in the ass but I missed Jacob's voice when it was gone from the group.

• "In My Life" -- Clay sings the Beatles. It's a beautiful song, and his tenderness and emotion made me tear up when I heard him do this live.
  

Where did he sing this?

• "Perfect Day" -- such a joyful song, IMO. Past that, I really don't know how to sum up why I like it so much, I just do!
  

My absolute favorite song from the album but some reason it wasn't a concert favorite so overall it didn't make my list.\

I Survived You" -- I'm sure it was projection, but I always wondered who he was directing the emotion in this song during the NAT. I truly love the performance I captured in Dayton. The joy of being in crappy seats...except that they were great for getting clack via the jumbotrons!

I think in the early days I thought Clay was fighting some deep dark demons but later came to believe he was acting. I'm probably wrong on both counts. Anyway had I done this list 5 years ago ISY would have been in my top 5 but with everything else Clay has done it fell out. Still love the concert versions though.

[ldyjocelyn]

• "Here You Come Again" -- when he hits those low notes during the song, it makes me shiver. I really wish more people could hear this song, and I was really hoping that this would have been released as a single from ATDW. It's such a radical departure from the original version, and I think it would have gotten some major attention.
  

One of my favorites from the album but didn't make my top 13. I think with this song and a few others on this album, I didn't know the original so Clay's was my only version.

For the record, the original by Dolly Parton: [media=]

• "In My Life" -- Clay sings the Beatles. It's a beautiful song, and his tenderness and emotion made me tear up when I heard him do this live.
  

Where did he sing this?

This was usually his encore or final song during the TnT tour. And then, he would leave the mic on the chair and walk off the stage, with the spotlight still on that chair. That was such a beautiful moment.

I can't wait to see your list couchie! I am enjoying reading everyone else's lists as well. Such good memories all around.

jmh, I know you've vented to me several times about the "old man," but reading your narrative was a good reminder to me about all you've been through, and I was able to put everything into context. Wow, what an experience!

[Couch Tomato]

Fear's list:

Fear we share 5 favorite songs. I love your list.

1. As Long as We're Here- Best song ever. I almost melted hearing him sing it at the 2011 gala.

LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS Song

3.Without You- My heart always skips a beat during the part where he has a little sob.

lsitI heard thsi song the other day in Lucky supermarket Ha ha. It took me a second to realize it was Clays' version. A couple of weeks ago on Undercover Boss they had the guy from Mood Music formerly Muzak. I love him a lot. Glad to see clay is on their playlists.

5.Something About Us- Best romantic song ever.

yep yep

6. Suspicious Minds- Better than Elvis.

I loved Elivs group up but mostly through the movies. As a pk I didn't get to hear much popular music. I never heard his version of this song. Still havent' heard it.

9.Broken Wings- Love the poetry combined with the song.

Me too

JMH..wow, how unexpected. And what a journey you took with him. I'm glad that you were able to finish. I hope, as he wanted, that it gets published. He sounds like an interesting character.

[shortyjill]

So I went in seach of the wallingford Good News but couldn't find it in audio. My favorite version is from El Cajon but I couldn't find just the full audio of just it. So then I started just looking for other concerts from 2004 JNT and finally hit one that sounds good and is a good recording. Canfly's version from Detroit. Shortyjill...do you have your Wallingford version just in audio or is it on video.

Just audio. If it's from a video, I don't know... I got it a long time ago and I renamed almost everything I downloaded back then. Kinda feel dumb doing that now! lol

jmh it sounds like you worked with a fascinating, albeit frustrating, man!

[jmh123]

Couchie, do you still have access to the CH vault? If so, there's a best of the tour CD with an mp3 of it here: http://www2.theclackhouse.com/clack/Concert_Clack/Joyful_Noise_Tour_2004/Ultimate_CD/

It's a pretty big file, too big to email it, but I can figure out someplace to upload it if you can't get it there.

[Couch Tomato]

LadyJ..thanks for the Dolly version. I love her. And I like her version.

Here's my list. i am a concert ho and I am mostly influenced by the songs he sang in concert. Very few of his songs sound better on a recording than in concert. When I was making up my list I realized I am Clay's perfect little fan. I love his type of music. It's my type of music. All of my favorite artists are balladeers e.g. Luther Vandross, Marc Anthony, Marvin Gaye (well most people wouldn't describe him as a balladeer but that's what HE wanted to be and had to fight to put out some music of that type ha ha). A lot of the songs I love build to this wonderful crescendo that just pulls me in.

13. These Open Arms -- I can listen to two lines of this song forever. "And what if every one you ever loved was torn from the pages of your life, would you reach out for tomorrow or try to turn back time" My heart just melts every time he says "torn" with that little break in his voice. I have hit replay a thousand times just to hear that part again. I have no idea who sings the original. Never heard it.

12.

- Unlike most folks it wasn't Idol or even the single that did me in. I liked those but wasn't wowed. Idol version was just too cut up and short. It was seeing it in Greensboro live for the very first time. And then the next night in Greenville. I still listen to the Greenville version of that song. It wasn't perfect either. But deep voiced Clay. Holding out the long note. The drama of the final note. I was STUNNED.STUNNED I tell you. I remember just sitting there in complete awe.

11. Broken Wings I loved the original. And I love this even better. Love the duet. Love her voice with his. Love the poetry. It's just a lovely lovely song.

10. Because You Loved Me - Is this a shock? ha ha. This is one of my favorite recordings from Clay. Why? Because I did my one and only slideshow with this song. The year I was unemployed and couldnt' give xmas presents I made a slideshow of the kids and gave it to my sister as a Xmas present This was one of the songs I used. I heard it over and over and over and over again as I pieced together that thing. And then when I was almost done with it, my computer crashed and I lost it and I had to do it all over. I know this song like the back of my hand. And man, I looked at it the other day. I hadn't seen it in YEARS and it made me cry. The kids are 13 and 10 now so seeing them as 1-6 year olds just brought back a lot of memories. I will always feel connected to this song.

9. The Prayer - Clay and Hannah - OMG, this was one of the best days ever. My lurker friend told me about this event and suggested I should get tickets because just maybe, MAYBE, Clay will show up. They were dirt cheap so I bought tickets to both nights. Not only was it a fabulous event but Clay did indeed show up on the second night and sang this. And while the whole bit is this comedy thing with laughter in the background - the two of them sang it perfect straight. I loved it. Hannah was my girl friend for a few months during the Spam run LOL. And they sounded so fabulous and had such a great reception. This is one of my favorite Clay events EVER.

8. To Love Somebody - Favorite song from IDOL. So happy to finally here it sung live.

7.

- As Fear I think said - very romantic song. And I loved it the first time I heard it. And then I saw this slide show with the First Couple and damn if my love for it didn't increase ten fold.

6. Lover All Alone - He wrote it. The words are beautiful but so is the music. A perfect partnershp!

5. Suspicious Minds - Jukebox tour - favorite tour STILL - so many songs I loved from that tour. But this was the song that I fell in love with it. I hadn't heard the Elvis version before the tour. It was a different type of song for him. Not a ballad. No really the big bombastic notes. it was fun. I like that I have the recorded version though as the girls tended to be a bit shrill on the live versions.

And here is where my childhood comes in. I'm a preachers kid. I spent much of my early life in church. And while I have as they used to say backslided - what I remember most from all those nights in church is the music. I was in the choir. I played the piano or organ in church services. I love gospel music. I love inspirational music. And Clay sang it with such a sincerity and passion and conviction. I would have been perfectly happy if he put out a gospel album. Which is why 2 of those songs are in my top 4.

4.

- This song for me is all about Clay's performance. El Cajon Good News JNT04 may still count as my favorite concert moment ever. When he gets to the part toward the end that goes "Oh I bring you good news... and he does those high note riffs..man he hits me right where I live.

3. You Were There - From the first note to the last I believe. I love every last note of this song. But when he gets to the end it takes me right back to my childhood. I love it. He kills it.

You were the Victor and the King

You were the power in David's swing

You were the calm in Abraham

You are the God who understands

You are the strength when we have none

You are the living, Holy one

You were, You are and You will always be

the Risen Lamb of God

2. Tears Run Dry -- favorite song that never made an album.

1. As Long As We're Here -- favorite Clay song of all time. I love the words, the celtic beat, the change of tempo, the wailing - everything about it

And that's it. I weep for some songs that just missed the list. One was actually on the list until I started writing this note but I felt Solitaire just had to be on the list.

JMH, yes Geekette just helped me recover my password and I was able to download some things that I've lost over the years.

[luckiest1]

Do you know it's taken me over an hour to catch up here? When is the last time that happened? Lol!

Thank you so much for the synopsis if the bookstore event, and the link to to story in Oprah magazine. How amazing to know that Allison Glock was going through all this, and was also writing Clay's book (although I have no idea I'd the timeline). It's like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle coming together.

Sorry to hear about injuries, I tend to fall a lot so I can relate. Jmh, what a wild ride you've had! Sorry to hear the "old guy" passed away. You should be proud of what you accomplished. I hope you get some sort of credit if indeed it is published.

Love all the lists! Omg, You Were There was so amazing in concert, wasn't it? I remember one night the left malfunctioned and Clay had to climb up the last few feet. And the "power in David's swing" when he swung his arm always got me!

I came home from the rink last night to more doggie misbehaviour...recycling strewn across the living room and no sign of the little devils. I found them upstairs, munching on white cheddar rice cakes. Omg I just about died. If you follow my Facebook you probably saw that Ringo just recovered from eating a 6 pack of Twix bars, along with their wrappers. But this time no wrappers, thank goodness, although they were still up in the night with tummy issues again . . I am going to have to think about crating, and it pains me to do that since Ringo is my rescue who was crated his entire life until I got him. But at this rate he's going to kill himself. It's all separation anxiety, he acts out when I go away. It's worse than having a toddler!

[aikim]

1 Day until the most awesome chat of 2013!

Instructions to get into the new chat:

1. Go to Chat

2. Click on the "Say" button..lower right hand corner

3. It will prompt you for a nickname.

4. Put in the user name you use at the OFC

5. Click "save changes"

6. Write a message and click "say" again..it will show up on the scr

Happy Birthday to all celebrating!

Everyone have a great day!

Kim

[merrieeee]

Tweet

@clayaiken: Beyonce just WORKED that National Anthem! That National Anthem needs a cigarette after what she just did to it!! That was INCREDIBLE!! Wow!

[merrieeee]

The tweet has been retweeted 648 times!

[merrieeee]

He is too funny!

@clayaiken: Looks like my girl, @kelly_clarkson has a fan! ;-) Calm down, Mr President. She's engaged now! :-) http://t.co/vDbX5Idx

[ldyjocelyn]

BWAHAHA ! I love that picture, have seen it make the rounds already today several times. Clay's sooooooo funny...

[FearofH2O]

Thanks for the conclusion to your story jmh. He sounds like a fascinating man, I hope something comes of all your work.

Enjoyed your list couchie in addirion to everyone elses. I was listening to his Best of Album in the car yesterday. What an amazing and versatile voice he has.

[aikim]

12 Hours until the most awesome chat of 2013!

Instructions to get into the new chat:

1. Go to Chat

2. Click on the "Say" button..lower right hand corner

3. It will prompt you for a nickname.

4. Put in the user name you use at the OFC

5. Click "save changes"

6. Write a message and click "say" again..it will show up on the scr

Happy Birthday to all celebrating!

Everyone have a great day!

Kim

[luckiest1]

Thanks aikim, I followed your instructions last night and it worked like a charm. Can't wait for tonight!

[ldyjocelyn]

Chat time! Special guest is Quiana!

[ldyjocelyn]

So...thoughts on the chat? The brief summary is that he and Quiana are recording a pilot for a radio show. It's kind of a chat show, with some music. However, it would be mostly C & Q chatting about questions people are submitting. The questions they want are like "Dear Abby." They will provide details later but want us to submit some questions, which would then be edited into a short program. It sounds as if they have some interest in it, on the production end.

I personally think it sounds like a good fit for Clay. He's so charming and witty and is usually pretty sensible. The friendship between him and Q would also be on full display. I saw someone on another board liken this to the banter he does during the tours with a bit more focus, and I like that idea.

I hope it works out for him...because I'd love to listen to him on the radio every night!

I enjoyed the chat tonight. He was smiley and happy and funny and...gosh, I love him!

[merrieeee]

Cute chat but Clay should have been bigger and Quiana smaller.

I wish him luck with the show it sounds like fun.

[shortyjill]

I love Clay, I really do... but I have mixed about the radio show. I know I'm not alone. I do hope he's able to get it off the ground and all the better for him if he can! He and Quiana were hilarious together tonight, I thought. The only part that got a bit tedious for me was when he was creating the guidelines... I doubt I'll be particitpating in the mock show and a friend and I started texting.. *oops* but it was about Clay and the chat! lol

A couple times it froze up on me, and the first time I actually had to close Chrome (which I was originally watching it in) and open it in Firefox. What a mess! I hope they fix that for next time. I'll have to watch it through tomorrow to catch what I missed.

One thing I discovered in my texting was... it doesn't seem to me like Detroit has many syndicated shows. I've never heard of Delilah before. All the radio stations I listen to have their own DJs with their own shows.. (just checked--Detroit doesn't carry Delilah). But I mean we don't even get Ryan Seacrest's morning show, and I know that's been syndicated! We get his AT40 though... Anyway, my point of this is... IF it all goes well for Clay and eventually starts getting picked up.. I think his chances of coming here are slim. I threw in a fast question about podcasts, and I saw others bring it up too..but he was right in that it's an idea for later. This fandom is savvy enough even if he never did them.

What Clay was talking about reminded a lot tonight of my favorite morning show that went off the air...they did a lot in the relationship advice category and they weren't professionally trained...they were just talk show hosts with a great sense of humor! They also relied on other callers and sometimes their advice was horrible so it made it funnier..

Didn't mean to write that much about it but it's how I feel...

[ausdon]

Sounds like it might be a good idea. Maybe a stepping stone to that talk show he has always wanted?

I daresay I could see some controversy - but isn't that part of why we are fans?

He often doesn't say what is expected and that is a good thing....... or a bad thing depending on what he's just said!

[FearofH2O]

I guess we are the only people left who have several radios in our house. We even have a turntable even though I practically gave away thousands of lps last summer. We have at least 2 radios on at a time. I can't sit and listen. For people who keep busy on one project at a time, I'd think a radio show would be great. I'd much rather he was on tv but my husband would agree with Clay's comment that he hates to shave. I think Clay's mugging faces and body gestures are a big part of what's funny about him. I may try and listen to the chat without the screen to see what he would be like on the radio. I do listen to talk radio in the car so I would definitely tune him in. The only problem would be making myself get out of the car when I got to my destination.

I thought it was a fun chat and laughed out loud several times. He and Quiana are so comfortable together. I didn't have any problems watching and litening to the chat. Could it have been a computer memory problem shortyjill?

ausdon, I agree that it could be a controversy or not. LOL And so goes this fandom.