#52: "He doesn't need the spotlight. He just glows."

[wandacleo]

I hate negativity toward Clay even more than I hate negativity toward anyone else.

Very interesting article about being gay:

The Gay Asterisk

[merrieeee]

I do not have a problem with people being fans of other contestants. I have bought other idol CD's. I just believe that not everyone is going to agree on everything and I do not like it(and to clarify, it does not happen here)when on Clay's own boards you have to step carefully when they discuss anybody else. Negativity is not allowed but negativity regarding Clay is approved.

I joke about not wanting read any more about AL. I also really don't care if anyone is a fan or a bi-fan or whatever but I get very annoyed when posts show up on Clay's own boards that are so critical of Clay that it makes my ears heart bleed! I understand wanting to defend your guy but at least show some respect to Clay. Is that too much to ask...is it...is it? (tmRick Holmes)

[gbmifan]

Hey, Merrieeee I love your post!!!! and agree.

[clayzedover]

Been reading around on the other boards. Sooooo tired of reading about the guy who shall not be named. A waste of my time.

I miss Clay BIG time.

Am loving all the pictures here. Just looking at him makes me smile.

[Clayzy]

Oh where oh where has my little gay gone

Oh where oh where can he be?

With his hair cut short and his tail so long

Oh where, oh where can be he?

I love Clay's big, long tail. It's so sexy. I shouldn't be so amused at my own bad humor.

[wandacleo]

I hate negativity toward Clay even more than I hate negativity toward anyone else.

Very interesting article about being gay:

The Gay Asterisk

I fixed the link that wasn't working.

[claylove]

Somewhat off topic and a bit of a rant but...

I was bcc'd on a letter that a fan sent to TBAF expressing her outrage about the name change, implying that TBAF is well-known its because of Clay's Fans and how dare you change the name. As a volunteer and a fan I find it REALLLLY embarrassing! Sometimes I just want to know WTF is wrong with people?!?! This sort of attitute just frustrates me because while the fans have indeed helped the Foundation to grow (and even TBAF recognizes this) for it to continue to flurish that growth needs to be about all people with and without disabilities, not just Clay Aiken fans and surely not about Clay. IMO the last thing Clay wants is for the Foundation to be about him. Plus I really think its so disrespectful to BAF and to Clay to take that "how dare you" attitude about anything they do. And I HATE HATE HATE that this kind of behavior gets labeled with that global umbrella of "Clay's Fans" because it surely does not represent a lot of us by any means.

Sigh...

I was okay with "the one who shall not be mentioned" just as a singer. It wasn't until the real person came out in interviews, etc. after AI that I found I didn't much like the person that he is. That is the difference for me. Clay is not just about the singing or the acting. For me its about who he is. And I have a great deal of respect and admiration for him well beyond just being entertained by him.

[aikim]

Just going to say "hi" and I had a eye doctor appointment...no need for new glasses right now and I went to the dentist and "look ma, no cavities" double . !

FromClaygary...totally agree!

Kim

[Couch Tomato]

Someone had the nerve to send a letter like that to TBAF and then actually told someone else they sent it? How idiotic. Does the ENTITLEMENT really surprise you though Claylove? When I think back over some of the darker history of the fan involvement in this charity -- it does not surprise me at all.

I think it's totally normal that people like artists that are very different from the other. Clay is kinda unique. He definitely has a singing style that is not really like other people that I follow. On the other hand Clay is the only person I really know about them and not just their records. I couldn't tell you what other artists do because I've just never cared. And I love some of these folks music very much. I have no idea what they are like as people but them being a good guy is not really a pre-requisite for me. I like bad boys too. Not saying Adam is a bad boy..I don't know anything about him. <TM Clay heee>I think AI is the kind of show that gets you involved in the singer's lives with more of an ownership of them. People feel they know them personally and they are emotionally involved. I think it's probably a tiny part of the reason I stopped watching. I can't afford another Clay...I'd have to go on welfare Hopefully people will just have respect for the community and go to an Adam board to celebrate him and not use him as some sort of weapon against Clay. But considering history I'm not sure that will happen. On the other hand I hope some sort of war among Clay fans doesn't become a permanent rift to deal with. I don't want to lose folks because every time they go to a Clay board they have to hear about Adam in a negative way. Maybe if we the fans don't hold on to it -- the media won't? I might have cracked myself up with that one LOL. I turned off my google alerts after reading a headline about Claymates spreading stories. I am just not intereted in following this nonsense and fan wars within this fandom or against some other fandom.

ETA: Hard core Clay fans can't keep TBAF in business. They need to expand in order to grow. The cause should be front and center, not Clay. I am sure he will remain an integral part of the organization.

[treenuts]

I think AI is the kind of show that gets you involved in the singer's lives with more of an ownership of them. People feel they know them personally and they are emotionally involved.

That's an interesting point, Couchie! Maybe that's why I don't get it, because I don't watch the show anymore. At least I didn't watch beyond 3 performance weeks this year because I couldn't get into anyone on the show. :clay:

[luckiest1]

I joke about not wanting read any more about AL. I also really don't care if anyone is a fan or a bi-fan or whatever but I get very annoyed when posts show up on Clay's own boards that are so critical of Clay that it makes my ears heart bleed! I understand wanting to defend your guy but at least show some respect to Clay. Is that too much to ask...is it...is it? (tmRick Holmes)

Of course it is. I think that there are some "fans" who are only hanging around Clay boards because it's habit, and because they feel they have "friends" there. They no longer particularly like Clay, so when an opportunity comes along, they revel in finding things to put Clay down with. I am NOT speaking to anyone here, obviously. But it's one of the main reasons I try not to venture out to other boards much anymore. I don't need that shit. I'm here to celebrate the man and have fun.

Fans sending nasty letters to BAF because of a name change just blows my mind, especially when Clay himself has expressed his desire and his excitement at renaming the foundation. Sometimes I don't think people can see the big picture. Yep, the sense of entitlement is astounding.

Wheeeeee one graduation down! It went well. I am a proud Mom. Now I have a week to recover and get ready for the next one.

[Scarlett]

Whew! First night I got home by 7pm this week. I was going to complain about my workweek but I read back a bit and saw Permaswooned's post.

{{{Permaswooned}}} :thbighug-1:

I still feel tired and sleepy but at least I didn't work hard this afternoon. It was our deparment team-building event so we had lunch at the ballpark and then we got to see the Astros play the Cubs. I only stayed until the blown save at the top of the ninth; I see from google that we eventually won in 13 innings. It sounds whiny but I would have preferred a "normal work" day because I would have been able to reset through my lunch hour and/or closed the door at various times during the day; schmoozing & small talk can be just as tiring as real work especially when you're fighting sleepiness.

I wrote a couple more blogs over the last couple of days. The Pool Boy visits Sally's. Oh......and in case your Danish is a little rusty, for the second one, I should illustrate......"fuld pakken"

Love your blog and thanks for the picture!!! We need it on this page too. BTW, does anyone have a comparable shot of Tampa 104?

Can I to the last few pages? And to the gifs!

I have a picture request (I don't think there's a gif for it). I think it's a tour photo of Clay from the SRHPT where he has his arms folded and he's looking at the camera with one hand out with the palm up. I can't think of the word to describe it... sort of a "what do you think'' gesture, perhaps? Wish I could remember more about it other than that (and that Clay's brow might be knitted...) Anyone wanna take a shot on such a sketchy description?

Well, I'm pretty sure this isn't it, but it vaguely fits the description, and he was so CUTE!!!

Thanks for the cute picture too!

Hey, at least it's your older daughter. My youngest graduates high school today, and my middle child graduates college next week. Heh, I feel old. All 3 kids are continuing on to higher education, so we aren't out of the woods for at least another 3 years. OMG. Fingers crossed that their OSAP applications get accepted. (provincial student loans)

lucky & muski, just keep telling everyone that you raised some very precocious children.

and good luck to everyone who has graduating family members this summer

Good luck to all the people wherever they'll go!

Since it's quiet I decided to think out loud. And no......it doesn't hurt!

I'm curious. I can't help but wonder how so many Clay fans can be equally or similarly OTT or at least engaged in following someone like he who shall not be named (that's for you, merrieeee :o) ) hee

I mean, I find the interest overlapping sooo perplexing! He is almost the anti-Clay and if he were the last singer/entertainer on the planet I wouldn't cross the street to see him much less throw my money at him. I can only imagine what that money may end up going towards. But even if it weren't about that, he just plain offends me. Clay is so much more of a real man IMO. Not afraid to stand alone for the underdog. The children in danger around the world or children with special needs here at home, or even just out actively and continuously supporting local community arts programs. There is nothing glamorous or cool about his causes. Clay Aiken is a gentelman. An unlikely sex symbol; a nerd and a family man. Not to mention a truly original vocalist. Not a poser or a wannabe rock star forming his persona, carving his image from some 1980's bedroom poster. How is it possible we can admire or lust after these two simultaneously? And I read so much about the "charisma"!? WTF? I mean Clay IMO is loaded to the teeth with the stuff, but this other guy? I can't seem to get past the greasy smarm enough to tell if there is anything closely resembling it. Oh well, I just thought I'd toss that out there. I apologize if this post makes anyone uncomfortable. That is not my intent. It is only my mind at work and a thought that boggles me!! meh

YMMV

The one time I ended up watching the unnamed one I didn't "connect" at all, even though (it turned out that) the performance I saw was supposed to be one of his better ones. Not my cup of tea.

About people liking both, I guess there will be some who will assume that they lead similar lives nowadays. Since September, most of the "news" has always been about a jetsetting life - car-buying, expensive clothes, fancy parties and hotels. We know better and we believe. However, the trouble with good PR is that it is so similar to other people's good PR. A couple of years ago, I started watching the news blurbs and op-eds that were written about the company I work for because I was surprised by a group of ads that seemed so Clay Aiken-like to me. They spoke of many of the items you enumerated above, treenuts, family values, caring for children, protecting those in danger, education for women, supporting local arts programs, etc. The series of ads were even predominantly white and Carolina blue. These types of ads only increased since then, eg. this year Carrie Underwood's trip to Angola got prominently featured. How can a newbie or outsider tell the difference?

I don't think a person's core changes very much but PR can't be used to explain or define one's core to others. In a world where just about anything can be explained away (/understood and condoned) by personal taste or individual circumstance, is there room for universal and eternal values? Can people believe that some things do not change and if they can, how can those things be communicated and used to define identity?

[FromClaygary]

Somewhat off topic and a bit of a rant but...

I was bcc'd on a letter that a fan sent to TBAF expressing her outrage about the name change, implying that TBAF is well-known its because of Clay's Fans and how dare you change the name. As a volunteer and a fan I find it REALLLLY embarrassing! Sometimes I just want to know WTF is wrong with people?!?! This sort of attitute just frustrates me because while the fans have indeed helped the Foundation to grow (and even TBAF recognizes this) for it to continue to flurish that growth needs to be about all people with and without disabilities, not just Clay Aiken fans and surely not about Clay. IMO the last thing Clay wants is for the Foundation to be about him. Plus I really think its so disrespectful to BAF and to Clay to take that "how dare you" attitude about anything they do. And I HATE HATE HATE that this kind of behavior gets labeled with that global umbrella of "Clay's Fans" because it surely does not represent a lot of us by any means.

Sigh...

I was okay with "the one who shall not be mentioned" just as a singer. It wasn't until the real person came out in interviews, etc. after AI that I found I didn't much like the person that he is. That is the difference for me. Clay is not just about the singing or the acting. For me its about who he is. And I have a great deal of respect and admiration for him well beyond just being entertained by him.

All of it. Every word.

.....and I bet I know who wrote the letter, don't I? ........

[keepingfaith]

Clay is kinda unique. He definitely has a singing style that is not really like other people that I follow. On the other hand Clay is the only person I really know about them and not just their records. I couldn't tell you what other artists do because I've just never cared.

I loved your entire post, Couchie. And I relate to the above -- at least for the past 25 or so years. In the 60's and 70's I was interested in whatever I could find out about the singers and musicians I loved, but there weren't many sources of information and artists could control so much of what was written about them (unless they got busted!). But generally they could release only as much information about themselves as they elected to. Those were the glory days of music magazines. For the past couple of decades I've continued to love music, new music, and bought tons of it, but knowing anything personal about the singers or bands never entered my mind. I was a dedicated fan of Clay on AI, and only watched it for him, but I never entertained the thought of looking for him on the internet. Until that one night I did. And I was amazed to find out that there was a world of Clay available on my computer. Message boards all over the place, and Clack so ample that I spent a year immersed in it. YouTube was fairly new and already loaded with Clay Aiken videos and montages, and I watched it ALL. I became a near recluse for a year -- downloading, watching, burning Clack ... and trying to stay calm about the infernal seemingly eternal turmoil at OFC. It's all still amazing to me. This Clay Nation, what a country!

[jazzgirl]

I don't have any problem liking AL or anyone else, and I already bought my concert ticket.

I don't see what liking another singer has to do with being a fan of Clay.I have no idea what causes AL is interested in--although gay rights comes to mind--so I can't pass judgment on that.

I have no idea what he'll spend his money on, so I can't make judgments about that either.

I just like to celebrate Clay. I have no interest whatsoever in trashing anyone else (with the possible exception of pondscum) in the process.

and

I think it's totally normal that people like artists that are very different from the other. Clay is kinda unique. He definitely has a singing style that is not really like other people that I follow. On the other hand Clay is the only person I really know about them and not just their records. I couldn't tell you what other artists do because I've just never cared. And I love some of these folks music very much. I have no idea what they are like as people but them being a good guy is not really a pre-requisite for me. I like bad boys too. Not saying Adam is a bad boy..I don't know anything about him. <snip>I don't want to lose folks because every time they go to a Clay board they have to hear about Adam in a negative way. Maybe if we the fans don't hold on to it -- the media won't?

I liked these posts. It reminds me of the Rodney King plea of "can we all get along" *g*. I think, like any relationship, people hopefully grow, and pick up new interests, while still being faithful and having fidelity to whatever originally brought them together. And when people bring more interests into a relationship, it is better than having one that is cloistered and stagnant. Look at all the growth that Clay has exhibited in six years. It would be very boring if he was exactly the same person. Likewise, many fans may develop divergent interests, but still have a place they call home, even if they may sometimes travel a bit.

Thanks for the link, wandacleo, very interesting insight.

<snip>I don't think a person's core changes very much but PR can't be used to explain or define one's core to others. In a world where just about anything can be explained away (& understood and condoned) by personal taste or individual circumstance, is there room for universal and eternal values? Can people believe that some things do not change and if they can, how can those things be communicated and/or used to define identity?

Yes, I think that's the whole "common ground" point that has been very successful lately, and is probably why most PR seems so homogeneous. And that's the room for the universal and eternal values, or at least those values that most in the vast area between the football goalposts aspire to, given there are always those within the 10 yard line of either camp who march to their own drum. And I think the question is whether people can acknowledge enough common identity on most things to embrace those interesting differences. And with Clay, many fans find enough common attributes to embrace everything, and with the "other guy", they may see him, as exactly that, "the other", because he is outside the vast middle or, maybe, their ears just bleed. *g*.

I still feel tired and sleepy but at least I didn't work hard this afternoon. It was our deparment team-building event so we had lunch at the ballpark and then we got to see the Astros play the Cubs. I only stayed until the blown save at the top of the ninth; I see from google that we eventually won in 13 innings. It sounds whiny but I would have preferred a "normal work" day because I would have been able to reset through my lunch hour and/or closed the door at various times during the day; schmoozing & small talk can be just as tiring as real work especially when you're fighting sleepiness.

I know, you love mankind, it's just people you can't stand (Charles Schulz via Linus) *g*. Scheduled sleeping like the Borg (*Star Trek*) do is a good thing (hint, hint).

[Scarlett]

Scheduled sleeping like the Borg (*Star Trek*) do is a good thing (hint, hint).

*g* got the hint... or better yet

[jmh123]

Wheeeeee one graduation down! It went well. I am a proud Mom. Now I have a week to recover and get ready for the next one.

I am dumbfounded. I just saw him a little over a year ago. Gosh. Wow. He didn't just grow; he grew up.

About people liking both, I guess there will be some who will assume that they lead similar lives nowadays. Since September, most of the "news" has always been about a jetsetting life - car-buying, expensive clothes, fancy parties and hotels. We know better and we believe. However, the trouble with good PR is that it is so similar to other people's good PR. A couple of years ago, I started watching the news blurbs and op-eds that were written about the company I work for because I was surprised by a group of ads that seemed so Clay Aiken-like to me. They spoke of many of the items you enumerated above, treenuts, family values, caring for children, protecting those in danger, education for women, supporting local arts programs, etc. The series of ads were even predominantly white and Carolina blue. These types of ads only increased since then, eg. this year Carrie Underwood's trip to Angola got prominently featured. How can a newbie or outsider tell the difference?

I don't think a person's core changes very much but PR can't be used to explain or define one's core to others. In a world where just about anything can be explained away (/understood and condoned) by personal taste or individual circumstance, is there room for universal and eternal values? Can people believe that some things do not change and if they can, how can those things be communicated and used to define identity?

Interesting questions. I think there's a conflict between entertainment-celebrity culture and the kind of values you are talking about. I'm not sure one can exist within the other. Ditto with corporate culture. A wise man who was a Harvard professor and came from a family that owned a large and successful corporation, Holmes Welch, wrote this in 1957 (in the name of another wise old Chinese man of several millenia ago):

"America's greatest troubles come from the advertising business...It makes people want to buy things that they would not otherwise want to buy. It fills their minds with desire for ingenious devices and with ambition to have more than their neighbors.... But this is not the worst. Advertising agencies are Press Gangs in the warfare between manufacturers where one pits his brand against the others. Here is a poor citizen minding his own business. See how the advertisers advance upon him and persuade him to choose a brand and be loyal to it! He becomes a soldier; he learns that because the brand he uses is superior, he is superior.... This cannot help but damage his character.

The advertising business supports newspapers, magazines, television, and radio. Without advertising most of these would pine away.... Then people would not know what was happening in the world and soon they would not care. After they ceased to care, they would become quiet, they would be ready for understanding.... To be always talking is against nature. Clever people are so busy supplying demand for talk and the rest of the people are so busy keeping the supply consumed that everybody knows everything, but understands nothing.

Then there is the practice of 'public relations'. Public relations are not only harmful, but foolish. To deafen the country with clamour about the good deeds of a man or company is to risk their goodness, while to say that the bad is good will be one's own undoing.... But it is more than foolish. It damages character....

What is needed by each of your great men and great companies is not an advertising program, not a public relations program, but an anonymity program. Each company then would have a Vice-President in charge of Anonymity, who would do what he could to keep people from learning about its good products and good works. Then the good works would be wholly successful and the good products would be bought only by those who needed them...."

[lilyshine]

Very interesting, but it's way too late for me to make a coherent reply. Maybe I'll try in the morning.

[preden]

I joke about not wanting read any more about AL. I also really don't care if anyone is a fan or a bi-fan or whatever but I get very annoyed when posts show up on Clay's own boards that are so critical of Clay that it makes my ears heart bleed! I understand wanting to defend your guy but at least show some respect to Clay. Is that too much to ask...is it...is it? (tmRick Holmes)

Of course it is. I think that there are some "fans" who are only hanging around Clay boards because it's habit, and because they feel they have "friends" there. They no longer particularly like Clay, so when an opportunity comes along, they revel in finding things to put Clay down with. I am NOT speaking to anyone here, obviously. But it's one of the main reasons I try not to venture out to other boards much anymore. I don't need that shit. I'm here to celebrate the man and have fun.

Fans sending nasty letters to BAF because of a name change just blows my mind, especially when Clay himself has expressed his desire and his excitement at renaming the foundation. Sometimes I don't think people can see the big picture. Yep, the sense of entitlement is astounding.

Wheeeeee one graduation down! It went well. I am a proud Mom. Now I have a week to recover and get ready for the next one.

Congratulations to the graduate and to the mom who has supported him!

[treenuts]

Congratulations luckiest and son!!

Interesting discussion today and some good observations made.

I don't think a person's core changes very much but PR can't be used to explain or define one's core to others. In a world where just about anything can be explained away (/understood and condoned) by personal taste or individual circumstance, is there room for universal and eternal values? Can people believe that some things do not change and if they can, how can those things be communicated and used to define identity?

Excellent questions, Scarlett. I'm not sure there is an definitive answer for anyone of these, though I'm still digesting jmh's response. A lot to think about.

Hey, did I scare bottle off with my Clongue?!?! wha' hoppen

[luckiest1]

Thanks for all the congrats for Stu! Congrats to everyone else who has a graduate this year as well.

Wheeeeee one graduation down! It went well. I am a proud Mom. Now I have a week to recover and get ready for the next one.

I am dumbfounded. I just saw him a little over a year ago. Gosh. Wow. He didn't just grow; he grew up.

Hee, your comment made me . The change is astronomical, I agree. He has had people pass him on the street or in the mall because they didn't recognize him. It's pretty amazing! He is also towering over me, and put back to back with his dad, Stu has the edge.

My poor brain can't keep up with the discussions here. Maybe Saturday or Sunday I can go back and read and comment. I am so glad it's Friday and I can finally relax tonight. It's been a hectic week. Tomorrow I'm going to visit heinz and attend her little town's Rosy Rhubarb festival! I love weekends.

[cindilu2]

Wheeeeee one graduation down! It went well. I am a proud Mom. Now I have a week to recover and get ready for the next one.

Congratulations to the grad and to the proud Mom!

TGIF!

[FearofH2O]

luckiest, gibby and muski congratulations to you and your kids. It's amazing how quickly we go from our kids asking for advice to us getting advice from them. Once they start paying for themselves they are on their way.

jmh, I have always had problems with advertising. I never watch them or read them. My husband is addicted to watching ads and he's a pretty smart guy. My oldest son works in that field and has recently started working with nonprofits as clients (with much reduced fees). He says his life is better now as he works for people with a cause rather than a profit in mind. The money no longer is important as he leads a pretty simple life: No car- rides a bike and takes public transportation, rents an apartment, buys used clothing, makes most of his food from scratch.

As I said I have no problem with multi star fans. I just don't have the time for that. I have to admire those who do. It's a shame that arguing for the one you like best entails insulting the other. It was pretty awful out there for a while.

[Kareneh]

Wheeeeee one graduation down! It went well. I am a proud Mom. Now I have a week to recover and get ready for the next one.

What a great picture! Congratulations to you both! And to all of the families with graduates.....these are the best and most exciting times, I think. Enjoy all of your celebrations!!

And speaking of pictures, that one Permaswooned linked yesterday is beyond CUTE!

Taking a break from unpacking boxes....don't feel like I'm accomplishing much other than making a mess. As much as I griped about its coming, I'm beginning to think "stuff" is overrated. I did find 2 external hard drives and some Clay CD's though. That was nice.

Oh, and I did find the hurling stick I won at a charity event on St. Patrick's Day in Baku. I think I'll keep it in the corner by the front door in case anyone without good manners comes calling looking for hardwood. I'll be able to help them with that. :bigemo_harabe_net-24:

[aikim]

Good Morning Everyone,

Scarlett I missed the Cubs/Houston game last night; from what you said, probably a good thing...sounds like an exercise in frustration which has been pretty common lately with them..being a Cub fan is not for the faint of heart!

Congratulations Luckiest1...I've been there myself...all the struggles and hard work are so worth it when you see your child walking across the stage to receive that diploma.

127 Days until The BAF Gala!

Everyone have a great day!

Kim